My sister is 17, I am 18. We often hangout together as we live in the same household. I often express annoyance to loud sounds or go non-verbal during such. My sister recently has stated she feels as though all I do is insult her when I had told her that she said something loud in her ear. I am confused as to why she is insulted. I often do get overwhelmed very easily and sometimes alone after too much has happened such as noise I hit myself in the end. I am wondering if I am the asshole for expressing this. I understand perhaps I could have been more polite, though sometimes she seems to make loud noises on purpose such as stirring her drink more aggressively in order to make more sound.
NTA. Misophonia is real and you may have it. It takes work on your end to try and curb the irrational anger it brings. Look into it and start practicing ways to not snap when noise is happening.
Thank you I’ll do some research and try to do better on that. I appreciate it
NTA, however depending on your tone I could see why she may feel insulted
Yeah, that would make sense. I’m not very good with tone, kind of sound like a robot a bit. Probably should work on that. Thank you
no problem, hey like another commenter said check out Misophonia
Yeah, I will make sure to
NTA, but you need to see a therapist about your noise sensitivity and other issues. Harming yourself as a result of getting overwhelmed by noise is pretty serious.
Try not to snap at your sister; she doesn’t understand.
Thank you, I appreciate it. I’ll try not to snap. Not the best with emotional regulation, though a therapist would definitely help with both issues as noise and that do not interact well
Nah. It’s understandable that noises might be frustrating but if she’s making normal living noises, it’s on you to keep the complaints to yourself and wear ear buds or headphones to reduce it. It gets quite wearing to be told frequently that you are too loud all the time.
That does make sense thank you
NAH because you have reason to be annoyed but also because I just think your sister doesn’t get it. Sometimes people make noises while existing that are unbearable to others. I have to leave the room every time a particular one of my roommates eats cereal.
Something that has been incredibly helpful for me is getting reusable earplugs that are designed to take the edge off of annoying noises like that but still let you hear well enough for conversation. The brand I use is called Loops but I’m sure there are other brands. I have multiple pairs that I keep in their little cases in various spots (like next to my bed or in my bag that I take when I leave the house) so I always have a pair easily accessible when I need to turn down the volume of the world around me.
That sounds amazing! Thank you!
They definitely don’t fix it but they do really help. Keep in mind that you might find it very unpleasant to eat while wearing them because the sound of your own chewing gets trapped in your head so if shared mealtimes are a common problem this might not really help with that.