My friend (16m) told me he had recently developed feelings for this one particular girl (15f) which he met at some fencing competition. He told us during a call between me (16m) and another friend (16m aswell).
He told us the first name of the girl, and it seemed like he didn’t want to give too much info on her. After the call ended, I got very intrigued on who this girl might be. So I went through my friend’s ig followers to see any girls that matched that name, I found 3. One of them was one of his classmates who obviously wasn’t the one he was talking about, the 2nd one was one of our mutual friend’s girlfriend and the other was some random girl which borrowing my friend only had other 3 followers I knew.
I thought that this must be the girl, so I followed her. She accepted my request and followed me back. I checked her profile and sure enough she was the girl, since I saw she had ig stories of her doing fencing. I didn’t think that much of it and just continued with my day.
The following day after school he texted me saying that she had told him one of his friends (me) had followed her on ig. He told me that I was a dickhead for going out my way to try to find her and follow her on ig without him giving his approval about it. He then went on how that could potentially damage his talking stage with the girl since she might find this whole thing odd.
I told him that he was overthinking it, but he was going to die on the hill that I basically hurt his chances a bit with the girl because she may think its weird that one of his friends just chose to follow her. I still believe he is overreacting. If she doesn’t like him that way, it clearly won’t be because I followed her. However, maybe he is right that I shouldn’t have followed her without at least telling him beforehand.
AITA?
YTA this is weird behavior. You don’t know her and did some weird creepy sleuthing to find her. Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.
Weird? Maybe a bit yeah, but it’s also social media, not like he was hiring a private investigator to find out info on her. People get random follows on socials all the time, a lot of people wouldn’t even think twice about it.
And you’re calling that part weird? What about the friend who is saying he “needs his approval” to follow a girl on social media just because he has a crush? That’s weird and incredibly controlling, and they aren’t even together. You don’t just go “I like her but haven’t done anything about it, you aren’t allowed to even know who she is!!”
If only a follow on social media from his friend stops her from going out with him, he never actually even had a chance in the first place.
You don’t need someone’s approval to follow anyone, it’s social media. It’s meant to be social
YTA. Not for having done it but for doing it without saying anything to him first knowing he was into her and you weren’t. Regardless of intent it just looks shady without at least giving the heads up. That said just apologize and don’t do anything else that can be misconstrued.
Yta becuz even if you don’t think it’s a big deal you still should have asked your friend and it’s none of your business to follow her just becuz you know your friend likes her. If it’s not tha big of deal to you, then you shouldn’t care enough to search and follow her.
Yeah, YTA. You don’t know her. If you’re going to snoop, at least have the decency to not interact. Especially when you already can tell your friend doesn’t want to share. He should be allowed some privacy here. He probably isn’t going to “lose his chance” with her, but by following her you are making her aware that he’s talking about her to his friends, which might share more about how he feels than he wanted her to know right now.
YTA. Major creepy stalker vibes from you.
Dude eww that’s so weird. Why on earth would you follow your friend’s crush that you DON’T know? sure as hell YTA I wish he throw the garbage of a friend you are
YTA. That’s weird lmao he told you he was talking to a female, idk where that equated to the stage of “hey guys this is my girlfriend” and being introduced properly, you don’t creep on someone’s profile like that normally.
YTA what the fuck goes on in your pea brain to think this was even a remotely good idea
YTA and you know it.
YTA – you made it abundantly clear that he’s talking about her to his friends. She’s probably wondering what tf he’s been telling you guys to get one of you to hunt down her IG and hit her up with a follow request.
…then you didn’t even say anything or explain yourself. So now she’s got this weird friend of this guy that she’s been talking to silently lurking her IG.
Not a good look for your friend.
YTA dude, that’s pretty weird behavior. You went full detective mode to find someone’s crush and then followed them without saying anything? I’d be pissed too if my friend did that
Like imagine explaining to her “oh yeah my friend told me about you so I stalked through his followers to find you” – that’s not a good look for anyone involved