My friend and I have known eachother since we were 15, and other the years he’s had a pattern of being kind of mean. I got bullied a lot in school and while he didn’t exactly join in, he always laughed along and made fun of me. I didn’t rlly mind, I just needed ppl to hangout with really LOL and they tolerated me, and later on after we started talking one on one he got a lot nicer and we even started watching movies and TV shows together and he even read some of my favourite books that he used to make fun of me for 😀
He didn’t really try to stop the bullying, but he wasn’t laughing along anymore, he just kinda stopped getting involved at all and validated my feelings when we were alone. The trouble kinda started when he did two things that sort of betrayed my trust, and I didn’t really know how to feel about it.
1) He knew some girls were planning to trick me into showing up to the school formal alone, and helped them
2) We decided to get the old group together to hang out, and the second he was around them, he started making fun of me again, and didn’t go back to normal after that
He did some stuff after, but that was the main turning point that changed things. I kinda tried to say how it made me feel? He apologised for the first thing, but he told me I was kinda just being over dramatic for the other. He was kinda generally just sort of rude, I had a whole plan to get a leavers gift for our history teachers as a group and he barely helped, sitting back and being super demanding of me doing everything and making me walk all over town to chase after him all while he kept making weird passes at me (or what I thought sounded like weird passes??) just so he could contribute a couple quid to it (which, honestly, I’d rather he just PayPal-ed me or something), I mean, I know it was my idea but it’s kinda mean imo to join the group and then hurl slurs at me for forgetting to pick up cards while I was out, and mostly, for this post, he had a big habit of showing up super late every time we hung out.
For context, I’m in university rn with no friends at all, and he was back in town for Christmas. I was super super lonely, which he knew, and I said we should hang out, and he texted me that he’d be around 5-10 (at the most) mins late. I was waiting, in the cold and rain, for 20 minutes for him, and the whole time, thinking about how he was just probably gonna make be mean again and my family was going to see the Christmas lights in the city and I just wanted to hang out with them instead. I feel really really bad about this, but I texted him saying I was really sorry, but I’d been waiting 20 minutes and had other plans, so I was just gonna head on. He texted me back saying verbatim:
“Say this instead of wasting my time
Fucking hell
Don’t say we should hang out when I’m back then dip because you have to wait a while
Christ”
I feel really really really bad, but my parents are saying I’m NTA bc of everything hes done before. AITA?
NTA
Why are you even friends with this abusive asshole? Join some groups at uni if you want to make friends there. Volunteer. Dump him for good.
Have some self respect and get a better friend.
Oh come on no friends is better than being around trash like these people. He is not your friend in any way from what you’ve described. Join an online discussion group or something, but this dude has zero respect for you.
NTA. I’m going to guess that you are a late bloomer. Feeling like the weird kid for most of your education can leave you with low self-esteem. You’re also probably very pretty which is why this “friend” is attracted to you.
If he’s not willing to admit he is attracted to you to his friends, he’s not good enough for you.
In a couple of years he’ll be regretting his choices and you’ll be living your best life. ✨
this right here…some how I completely missed OP was female… I was thinking male…
NTA
Get rid of him amd when you feel lonely try to joun groups of people with similar interests like you have. Nowadays its easier than ever to do so, especially at uni. Never deal with toxic people like him again and keep your chin up high full of self respect.
NTA but please realize he’s not your friend at all.
NTA. This guy isn’t a friend.
Get therapy and block every last one of those people. You’re at university find hobbies you like and try them out, friends will be made. RESPECT YOURSELF.
NTA, this guy isn’t your friend at all. it sucks being friendless, but it’s better than having a “friend” who just picks on you whenever they get the chance. i know from experience 🙁
get a dog n leave this guy a flaming bag on his porch…
and you know you’re NTA