My dad, Aaron, his fiancé Tina, her daughter, Lola and myself F21 recently got back from a trip to India. I have an area at their house, like an insulated shed. I’ve stayed here on and off during my teen years and have had countless adventures in there.
Before the holidays ended, Lola had a few friends over in my shed while I was not there. I don’t have any issues with her being there and she did rearrange a few of my things so her friends wouldn’t be tempted which I do appreciate. Someone still managed to find my bong and it got broken. I found multiple pieces of glass on the table, ground and even in my shoe. At this time Tina was there and she acknowledged that her friends had been in there and we both understood. I was upset at my property being broken but I haven’t been smoking as much and didn’t “need” it so I wasn’t distraught. When Lola got home she came to debrief about things, I asked and she explain. She told me that she did her best to hide things but a girl got it out. She said no but it was too late. At the time I purchased this accessory it was $150. She also owed me $25 for a previous thing, so I asked for $175 which she sent to me immediately. She hates people being upset with her. She has a job with a few shifts a week. She ever so often gets me to purchase things for her that she cannot and in return I get a $5-10 tax. This works for us, we hangout with both our friends together, we stay up late talking about silly and deep things, we have a number of internet brain rot sayings and stims that no one else understands. She’s one of my favourite people and I love being the big sister I never had. She paid and we continued with our usual banter. Aaron approached me this afternoon and said he’d been to Cloud 9 today and the exact bong I had was $55, so why did I charge her so much? I explained the numbers to him and he told me “you need to act like an adult here, that’s most of her pay check.”
I told him when you break or lose another persons thing you are responsible for the replacement of it. He went on about how it’s a different price now than what it was so she should pay for the price it is now. We went back and forth for a while. Lola got home and we spoke but not about this situation before she needed to leave to get ready for a party. We’ll speak when we get the chance, I’ll send her money back if she desperately needs it or she feels wronged. I’m happy to have a conversation about things and get to a middle ground. I know she just wanted the situation to be over with. Aaron only brought it up because she asked for money to get a friend a birthday present for the party and he was confused because she’d just been paid and that’s we when she explained the situation to him and Tina. Tina knew that we’d handle it between the two of us. I can understand she might not be ideally happy about the amount paid. Am I the asshole for charging her what it cost to me instead of its current price? Had to cut a lot for word count
YTA. Her obligation is to replace the bong. If she can do that for $55 you have no business charging her $150 because that’s what you paid.
Seriously, this isn’t even a close call.
Came here to say exactly this. YTA
YTA, if it cost way less now then she only needed to pay back what it would cost to replace it not what it cost you when you originally bought it.
Send her back $95 and apologise for not checking the current pricing of the item first.
ETA stop charging her “tax” on things you help her buy too, unless its fuel costs to get to item and back. You claim you love being a big sister but honestly it comes across as you taking advantage because sister doesnt want to upset you and wants a close relationship with you.
Gentle YTA. If the bong costs less now then buy it for less and return the difference. Also her friend should really be paying her back, but thats not your business. Dont overcharge if the exact same bong is now on sale – think of it as a win win. You could return all the money ($150) and ask your sister to simply replace the bong. Either way, dont overcharge.
YTA.
She owes you for what it costs to replace the item.
It is seriously messed up for you to charge her triple that.
YTA.
You overcharged for a bong that you don’t even use anymore.
And it probably wasn’t worth anything as a used bong.
N T A at the start if you didn’t know the piece had gone down, YTA if it’s truly the same bong for a lower price. You said it yourself, she owes you replacement and right now replacement is $55. If it had been a vintage item that had increased in price due to its scarcity would you not expect the true replacement cost?
YTA. She broke a bong, she owes you a bong. That bong costs $55 now, therefore she owes you $55. If you overpaid a year ago, that is not her fault. Replace your bong, give her the change.
YTA for charging her more than the actual replacement cost for the bong AND for charging her a “tax” to borrow money occasionally. This isn’t how normal people act with each other, you’re acting like a predatory lender
You started being the asshole the moment you were told the current price and doubled down.
Your sister(‘s friend) broke the bong and should replace it. That I agree with.
But if the bong is cheaper now, she should either give you the current cost or a new bong. Not the price you paid when you got it.
Your bong was not new. Not even insurance would cover the full amount. It’s fair to want a replacement, not fair to take advantage of a kid’s good faith.
YTA
If you break something, you replace it. If the current price of the item is less, then you can replace it for that amount. Otherwise you are making a profit from an accident. In fact if you went out to find a used bong in the EXACT same condition as yours, it would be LESS then the current new price. Refund the difference like a good person and a good big sister.
well.. YTA because
1: who taxes a petty loan? the problem goes far beyond you overcharging her. you never had the extra 5-10 to begin with, yet you see her desperation as an opportunity to take a little extra from her… odd
2: it doesn’t work like that in the real world. if i buy a car for 20k in 2020, it won’t be worth that same 20k the moment it even leaves the lot, let alone years later. Bongs aren’t a collectors item, their value doesn’t appreciate. in your case the value actually depreciated significantly. you can get a brand new bong for over 60% off.
it sounds as though you’re just being money hungry, while trying to “teach her a lesson” about the way of the world. a lesson that you’re not in the position to teach.
Gotta love a dad who goes bong shopping for his daughter who lives in a shed.