My child (17) has an end of school dinner/celebration. They aren’t finishing school for good, however that particular school finishes at their current grade and the whole grade are changing schools next year, hence the end of school event.
My child (who has a few social issues and has had a very rough year) didn’t want any parents attending at all however school rules state the students must attend with a parent/carer/significant adult (they can bring a maximum of two). I didn’t want to go alone so encouraged my child to think of someone else to invite. They don’t have much contact with their dad at the moment, so I suggested one of their grandparents (one of my parents). My child was adamant they didn’t want anyone else to come. Days later I asked again and my child told me I could ask a specific family friend knowing that person would be good company for me on the night. However now my mother (child’s grandmother) is very upset that she
wasn’t asked and that someone from outside the family has been asked. My mother is talking about the event as a graduation and is hurt that she doesn’t get to attend her first grandchild’s graduation. I never thought of the event in the same way and as such haven’t attached the same meaning to it and therefore didn’t think that who was asked would be a big deal. I was trying to make the event as easy as possible for my child and for me (I don’t know any other parents at the school). When my mother told me how hurt she was I did ask her to come but she now doesn’t want to as she wasn’t the first choice.
I have two questions:
1) AITA for not considering her feelings in this; 2) should I now just deal with the awkwardness of going alone so that we’re not taking someone that isn’t family