I got married in Palm Springs and the only thing on the invitation was the wedding itself. However, we did have an AirBnB for a week and told people that we would be in town for the week and if they wanted to hang out with us they were more than welcomed to do so. We had no agenda besides hanging out and maybe hit the town. The wedding itself was also super low-key and mostly just a party with 35 people.
This was made clear to my family who was flying in from all over the country and even Canada. My wife’s family is in the area and we live driving distance to Palm Springs. We also allowed my siblings to stay in the AirBnB with us for free to help with costs. The day before the wedding, my sisters get into a big fight with my wife and I over the fact we had a “destination wedding” and that we didn’t have planned activities for our guests for the whole week leading up to the wedding.
We didn’t have a huge budget ($6000) and 90% of that was spent on food and party rental supplies (chairs, plates, utensils, etc).
NTA. People can entertain themselves. You are providing what you can (like free housing). If folks don’t like it they are welcome to plan all the activities they want.
Who, in the hell thinks the bride and groom should plan out a WEEK of activities for the guests. I tend to think they will be pretty busy with, I don’t know, wedding stuff.
Plus, they weren’t asked to come a week ahead. To me it’s pretty clear that you’re on your own. 🙄
Exactly.
While I do think some couples are way too self centered about their wedding and forget that your guests are GUESTS whom you’re hosting… this is on the other end of the spectrum with the guests being way too entitled.
I’d rather they DIDN’T plan out a week of activities.
If I’m traveling for a wedding, it’s part vacation for me.
I’d rather attend the key wedding events and otherwise do my own thing.
NTA. Your sister’s wrong; it’s not a destination wedding if you are within driving distance from the venue.
And it took her until the wedding day to be annoyed? Wow!
A whole week of activities, what? They’re adults, they should be able to entertain themselves, especially since they didn’t have to pay for lodging. NTA
Also, if you’re in the US and just traveling to another state, is that really a destination wedding? I know OP said some people were coming from Canada, but I got the sense they were the exception.
I’ve flown all over the country for friends’ weddings, and I usually give myself a day or two either before or after to go sight-seeing, especially if it’s a place I’ve never been. I’ve been the aquarium (or zoo) in almost every state I’ve visited.
I mean, the U.S. is huge so I’m gonna say yeah, you could definitely go to a destination wedding traveling from one state to another. Heck, some states are big enough that traveling from one town to another could be a destination wedding as well.
It’s not a destination wedding if it’s where the couple lives. It’s a normal wedding where some guests had to travel.
NTA. You did plan a week of stuff – hanging out for free at the Airbnb. If the itinerary wasn’t to sisters liking she was free to plan something. Or did she expect you to plan and PAY for a week of entertainment?
NTA – and your sisters should be ashamed of themselves to not bring their complaint to you but to their soon to be SIL. What entitled brats.
NTA, it’s more rude to plan their activities in my opinion…. Some people just want to relax.
Not to mention that arguing with a couple the day before their wedding is AH behavior
If they wanted some ideas they could have asked in advance… or looked on TripAdvisor
“My wife’s family is in the area and we live driving distance to Palm Springs.”
Definitely NOT a destination wedding.