So I’ve been with my fiancé for a year and a half now (romantic relationship wise), and our birthdays are a day apart. We love together and his little sister lives with us as she schools here. I wanted to go to this one restaurant for dinner and drinks on the weekend of our birthday, but he wants to bring his sister along. Now I’m not a big fan of that, because she just ruins the mood and we’ve had an up and down relationship in the past as she always complained to her family and elder sister that she doesn’t like me and we don’t ever take her out on dates (she’s a big attention seeker). On my fiance and I’s first anniversary I made it clear to him that I would like it to be just the 2 of us going out as our 1 year being together was a very special to me, in which he agreed but a day later he invited his mother and his sister to join us, and mind you I couldn’t say no because he told them to come without talking to me first. Also I was paying that night. Now that our birthdays are coming up in 3 weeks he mentioned bringing his sister, I wouldn’t of minded but I just want to have a good time with him since I didn’t even get to spend quality time with him alone on our anniversary. Last year. Our birthdays are on a week day so we will have that chance to spend time with our family and have a small celebration, is it really that much of a problem that I want to spend that weekend with just him? 🤦♀️🤦♀️
NTA. You have a huge fiancé problem. It is important for couples to get time together where it is JUST THEM to strengthen their relationship. She has no business on a date with you and he shouldn’t be inviting his family on dates.
Thank you!! I’m getting so frustrated at how things are going at this point
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You got engaged very quickly, that usually is a red flag.
He more or less forced you into paying for a meal for his mother and sister after you clearly expressed you wanted a 1:1.
Return his birthday gift. He is not the one.
Why does he invite his family on dates with you?
That’s just weird.
I would re think the wedding and the whole relationship
Maybe she has money and he wants her to get used to supporting his family. I would not have paid for them the first time he invited them. I would have said right on the spot, Well, I’m getting your dinner. You can get theirs. I can’t afford all three of you. It doesn’t pay to be too polite with people like this. They will push until you push back.
Why are you involved in this family? Your fiance does what he wants whether you like it or not. Run! away from this so called relationship.
Nta. You have a fiance problem because he doesn’t give a second thought about inviting his family and not consulting you first. That’s very inconsiderate and disrespectful in my opinion.
Nta -but this shows a lot of signs of a very concerning relationship. How old are you both even? It is really odd for a 15-year-old continuously asked me taken on dates with her brother. Being engaged after only a year and a half with that relationship having a lots of ups and downs is a red flag. You’re still in the new relationship energy stage where your brain is pumping you full of chemicals that help you feel in love such as oxytocin.
Please take a step back and try to picture one of your friends describing whatever is going on in your relationship to you. Does it still sound like a healthy relationship?
You might want to slow down on the wedding plans until you get this thing figured out
Exactly what I’m thinking
Hold on! You paid for your anniversary and he invited extra people? Did you pay for them also?
You guys live together, does his parents give you any money towards housing their daughter? How are the bills split? Are you being financially taken advantage of?
You have a fiancé problem sweets why doesn’t he want to spend one on one time with you?
NTA But do you really want to marry someone that will never put you first?
Nta but why are you spending time with someone who prioritizes his family over you? If you were to be paying for the bday dinner and he invites his mom & sister to join without consulting you first, why didn’t you just back out of that one? Did you have to pay for everybody? The 15 yo doesn’t have any business going on dates with you two. Why isn’t she living at home with her own mother? You want to marry into this family where you will be just the tag along with your husband? Nah, I’d rethink this whole thing. Find your own place and find someone that puts you first.