my cousin lives w my grandma. i live a good thirty minutes away from them (walk, i do not own a automobile). my grandma fled to another city to be w my aunt (my baby cousin was recently born) and my cousin suddenly has a boyfriend and needs to stay all day everyday with him. he lives in another city (close to ours, a twenty minute drive — my cousin has a bike, boyfriend has a car) and so i need ro abdicate from staying at home with my own cats to be taking care of HER cat. my grandma doesnt want the house to be… alone? so i need ro go over there be… alone? at night? i said i couldnt and my cousin said I’m… selfish, so
NTA you don’t live there and your cousin does. You have an animal at home to care for and no transport.
Your cousin is the selfish one.
NTA it’s your cousin who is selfish.
Your cousin understands that she can be alone with loverboy at grandma’s house while she’s gone, doesn’t she?
why would she want that? she’d have to clean around
Who asked you to stay at your grandma’s house? Did your grandma ask you? Your cousin LIVES there. She has first and foremost responsibility to take care of things like this. It might be a different story if you had a car, but to expect you to make an hour-long round trip walk there when your cousin can just not sleep at her boyfriend’s house for a bit, is crazy. NTA.
It’s time we all stop giving in to people who shamelessly try to force us into serving their needs by calling us “selfish.”
Of course you’re not selfish!!!! Your cats rely on you for their every need. It would be cruel to abandon them the way your cousin is abandoning their cat. Your cousin is selfish.
My response to cousin would be, “Yes, I’m selfish. So what?”
NTA
It’s wild how often “selfish” is weaponized to make someone do something they don’t want to. Protecting your cats isn’t selfish, it’s responsible.
You are not selfish, you also have your life. If you want to help, the most you could do is take his cat to your house.
NTA. Sounds like very much not your problem.
Just Don’t go
NTA. Your cousin doesn’t *need* to stay with her bf; she *wants* to. As the one who lives with grandma, she’s the one who should watch the house. She literally lives there: no housesitter required! Your cats need you, and you’re allowed to have what you want. Your cousin says you’re selfish because you won’t do what she wants lol.
NTA. Honestly, this sounds like your cousin’s problem. Please stop in and check on grandma’s cat, but let your cousin worry about staying there. If anything, bring the cat to your place?
You know how I’d feel if some rando cousin called me selfish? I wouldn’t give a flying fart.
NTA