Some context my husband and I make good money and live below our means generally. We are currently enjoying a winter vacation in a mountain hotel (4000€ for the week approximately) hotel includes breakfast en dinner but not drinks at dinner.
The hotel charges 4 euro for a litre of water (just tap water but all the water in the mountain village comes from a spring). Although I think this is a little much from the restaurant it’s not something I let ruin my mood.
I have astma so after a day of being outside in the mountains I’m generally extra thirsty.
At diner my husband made a remark about me drinking as much water yesterday at dinner as it costs to fill our pool at home.
We went ordered a bottle of wine and water when we sat down to dinner. and during the dinner I ordered another water (same as yesterday)
My husband looked very upset when he came back from the restroom and the water was brought to the table. He didn’t refill his glass or drank any water after that.
After dessert I finished my last sip of wine from my glass and my ice cream. There was about a glass of water left in the glass water jug. He asked me if I was finishing the water and I said no, I wasn’t thirsty anymore and full from the five course dinner.
He then proceeded to berate me for ordering water if I wasn’t going to finish it. He then poured himself a glass of water and finished it in one slug.
I told him I found it petty that he was so upset about it.
He told me o should have asked first to order water (if anybody wanted more) keep in mind our four year olds glass was also empty.
I told him I’m a grown woman and I’ll order water if I’m thirsty. But I’m not being made to feel bad for leaving a little at the end of the dinner if everybody had had their fill.
So am I the asshole for ordering water for the table knowing I would drink the majority of the liter myself?
if your husband wants to ruin a 4000 euro stay over an extra 4 euros of water, there are bigger problems going on.
NTA. WTF is wrong with your husband?
NTA
This is such a weird hill for your husband to choose. Is something else going on with y’all?
NTA.
Your husband is a major one, though. If he’s so hard pressed over 4 euro for some water that he has to bully and berate you while you stay in a multi-thousand dollar resort, you have a husband problem.
NTA that bottle of wine probably cost way more the 4 euro. What a weird thing to be mad about when dropping 1000x more money on a vacation
You already know that you’re not the asshole. I mean who treats anyone like that and why would you even put up with something like that?
My question to him would be what was he really upset about that he would be so disrespectful towards you?
NTA. But seriously? Is your husband like this usually? Or is it specific to paying for water? If it’s an automatic response to paying for tap water (which really should be free), and sees that he’s been overreacting, then okay. But otherwise it’s a big overreaction on his part.
NTA and holy cow, is your husband always this controlling? Over €4 or €4000, it makes no difference. By this same logic, no one should order a meal if they don’t intend to finish every single bite (ridiculous).
I bet that European mountain spring water is super delicious — order an extra bottle for me tonight.
You are definitely NTA. Please know that
I suspect this isn’t about water. 🤔
NTA. You guys spent $4k on a hotel for a week but he wants to throw fits about $4 water bottles? Nah
NTA
Your husband is okay paying $4000 Euro for a weeks stay but is squawking about $4 Euros for a bottle of water?
Sounds petty to me, “A Happy wife is a happy life…😜😎”
NTA If he’s stressed over finances, why did he agree to book an expensive vacation? Is this a pattern with him? Is he always this controlling?
NTA. If you can afford €4000 vacation and wine and dessert with dinner you can afford €4 for water. Your husband is being weirdly cheap. It’s important to drink water especially at high altitudes, dehydration is dangerous at that altitude and the dry air makes it worse.
What a controlling cheapskate