The situation is/was the following: Because my friends are all university Students and I have already made some money, I tend to pay for them to join me on Holidays e.g. pay for the Hotel/AirBnB as I need it anyway and let friends join for free. No 5 Star Hotels, mostly cheap AirBnBs and Ryanair Flights 😂
RN we have a group holiday planned and I payed the Flights and Airbnb for 5 ppl including a Female friend of mine. My now ex GF was invited to this Holiday, but didn’t want to go, because she didn’t like the AirBnB. But when she found out that I often pay for everyone including this friend she got furious. First she talked about my friends using me and then swung to accusing me of wanting to cheat on her with that friend and that just paying for her is already cheating.
So am I the Asshole for paying for my HG ? (I could have understood it more if it was just the two of us going, but it was a group holiday and we would have mostly had separate beds, maybe 2 Ppl will have to share)
Do they ever pay for you?
They offer, but usually I decline. I get a bunch of very thoughtful gifts often made in hours of work tho, e.g. one friend knitted me a sweater
NTA, this is an ex, do what you want.
However, if I can give you some advice, save your money. Stop paying for everyone. There will come a time in a few years where they will have saved everything and you’ll have spent it on them and they’ll turn their nose up to you.
Be sensible, spend for fun, but budget more toward your savings and if your friends want to come on holiday, they can chip in.
I didn’t make that clear in the post, because it didn’t seem relevant, but I have “Fuck you Money”, I have enough for the rest of my life and some for following generations. 😅
Lottery winners end up broke with this same mentality js
NTA spend your money how you please. You ex is jealous but if she really cares she’ll get over it. Who turns down a vacation because they dont like the free Airbnb?! She sounds like the user.
NTA. It’s your money so you get to decide how to spend it. Your ex is looking for excuses to be mad because she either has regrets or just doesn’t like that you are not upset enough (still going on that holiday with your friends and living your life).
YTA for expecting us to know what a “HG” is…
I’m not doing research to figure out an apparently relevant term in your post because you’re too lazy to write in English.
Thank you. I choose to believe it stands for “hunky gardener”…cue porn music.
It doesn’t matter anymore because she’s your ex and she’s not going. NTA
NTAH, she is not in your life anymore. Just ignore her. Why are you even in contact with her anymore? She can kick rocks
NTA, if a group is going and 1 of them happens to be female and you can admit you don’t have feelings for this friend & you invited your (ex) GF. Obviously you weren’t planning to do anything with your HG. Based on your other comments, you’ve got some good friends and want to treat them in kind. The ex sounds possessive.
NTA you can do what you want with your money and it sounds like these are good friends.
I would just examine if you might feel an expectation of you paying as that can then feel like a heavy burden but from your comments, your friends are grateful and pay you back in small ways like home made gifts.
Just because one friend is female, doesn’t mean you want to be with them. Your ex needs to look at her own issues for why she would assume that. Especially if you can say hand on heart, there is no attraction there. I have lots of male friends who I hang out with and my husband is fine with it as we trust each other.