AITA for potentially going on holiday without two of our childhood friends?

(AWTA)\* We’re a group of 9 friends who’ve known each other for over a decade. Around 3 months ago (Dec 2025) we started planning a group trip to Morocco and everyone initially agreed. About 2 months later, two friends’ parents refused to let them go because they think Morocco is unsafe, though they said a European trip would be fine. For over a month we tried different ways to convince their parents but every attempt failed. Because of this we decided to call the two friends separately and ask how they would feel if the rest of us still went to Morocco. In our view it’s normal that sometimes not everyone can attend trips, and if we were in their position we wouldn’t want to hold the group back after so much planning. When we asked Person A they were initially annoyed but later said they understood and might have overreacted. We tried calling Person B but they didn’t answer. A few days later Person B’s mum joined a call with another friend’s parent and some of us; none of our points were accepted and both Person B and their mum repeatedly said we should go without her. Later someone shared a Morocco Airbnb and I sent a video about Morocco being safe to a gc. Person B replied “but we’re not going to Morocco?” suggesting they thought we had dropped the idea. We planned to try call them later again to clarify, but Person A told them beforehand and we were unexpectedly called around 7:30. Person B joined very emotional, saying even asking the question meant we don’t care about them and are choosing the destination over the friendship. Because this could be our first group trip they said they would never consider doing that and think we’re insane for suggesting it. They want us to change destination but only suggested Portugal, which most of us don’t want, and many of us have already been to other major European countries. They also believe we only asked to clear our conscience and would have gone anyway. From our perspective asking was respectful because booking without telling them would be worse, and if we were in their position we’d likely feel more frustrated with our parents than our friends. As well as that, after the calk with person A, I sent that vid to help convince them.Morocco was chosen because it’s affordable and culturally interesting, we feel it’s unfair for the other 7 people to spend money on a place they don’t want. They think we care more about Morocco than them, but we’ve explained it’s simply the most practical option since they’re limited to Europe. They also said our standards of friendship are lower and that they’re morally above us. During the first call some of us were told to shut up but we didn’t reciprocate to be productive. Later Person A said Person B speaking like that was justified because they were angry, which we disagree with. Even after explaining everything their response stayed the same: that we care more about the destination than them and they would never do this to us, so we’re asking for unbiased opinions.

13 thoughts on “AITA for potentially going on holiday without two of our childhood friends?”
  1. How old is everyone in this post? If you are minors, then too bad for A and B, then it’s a Nah but they are being brats about it. You could consider traveling within your country for a first trip.

    Honestly trips can break friendships, from experience.

    Else if they are legally adults, A and B are assholes.

  2. **NTA.**

    ~~I-N-F-O:~~ ow old are you all?

    It seems a little odd that two of your group are (apparently) still young enough that they have to seek permission from their parents and abide by their refusal, yet are old enough to go to a foreign country without a parental chaperone. I can’t reconcile those two things. If you are old enough to go unaccompanied, surely you are old enough not to need anyone’s permission.

    **UPDATE:**

    It turns out A and B are 18, and in OP’s country that means they don’t actually need parental permission. So they could go if they wanted. But if they wouldn’t dream of disobeying their parents despite being 18, or they’re afraid of what the fallout will be if they do, then this is my verdict, and my reasoning:

    **OP is NTA for going to Morocco with the rest of the group.**

    I’m part of a friend group of eight people. Getting us all together in the same place at the same time, even if it’s just to go out to dinner, is like herding cats.

    Someone already has a commitment that evening. Someone doesn’t want to be out late because they have an early start the next morning. Someone will be overseas on that date. Someone said they’d go but since then, oops, they’ve had a fall, they’ve injured their knee, it will require surgery, and they’ll be in hospital on that date. And so on and so on.

    So we pretty much have an informal rule. Someone comes up with an idea – a lunch, a show, an evening out, a trip away, whatever. We throw open the idea to the group.

    Want to join us? Free on that day/weekend/week? That’s great! Want to join us, but not free? That’s too bad – we’ll miss you! – but **the rest of us are going anyway.** Hopefully you’ll be able to make it to the next outing.

    In my friend group, the people who can’t go would never dream of dictating to the rest of the group what they should do. And if we only chose places and dates that all eight of us were able to attend and wanted to attend, we’d never go anywhere.

    OP, you should adopt the same policy with your friend group.

    1. Our ages range from 17 to 21, everyone has permission except from two 18 year olds, we also kind of have the mindset that we are mainly all young adults and that we have some people above twenty in our group so that we would be safe but as you can see two parents disagree

      1. *as you can see two parents disagree*

        Yes, I see that, but I don’t see what the problem is.

        If A and B are 18 years old, then in my country they are considered adults and don’t need parental permission. They might like to have their parents’ *blessing*, and it sounds like they’re not going to get it, but they don’t need *permission*.

        Are 18-year-olds not considered adults in your country?

        1. We’re from the Uk and 18year olds are adults yeah. I guess they just have stricter parents, the 17 year old is going with her 19 year old brother so that’s why there’s no problems on her end if ur wondering

  3. Nta. Why should 7 people choose a destination they don’t want to go to just because 2 people are unable to attend . If I am spending my money on a trip it will be to somewhere I actually want to go .

  4. NTA. They can’t go, that’s no reason for everyone to miss out. I’m also curious how old you are — this is pretty ambitious for a group of teens, or if you’re adults they don’t need their parents permission. Don’t think it changes the verdict though, just whether I have some sympathy for them or absolutely none. 

    1. Thanks for the reply, our ages range from 17-21, and we’re from the uk. The two who can’t go aren’t 18 years old.

  5. Soft YTA/ soft ESH. Friends A & B should have been more vocal/ orward about their feelings from the beginning before letting yall get so attached and deep into planning (though sometimes it’s hard to access these feelings until the trip becomes more real).

    If two of my friends couldn’t go, I would have adjusted the trip to be inclusive of everyone. I would have felt bummed and even a little resentful, but inclusivity would have been my top priority.

    It would have been different if you had already planned the trip and invited the two to go along…but yall started planning together. You ARE choosing the destination over the relationship.

    I don’t think you all are terrible people if you end up choosing Morocco. But I would absolutely feel hurt and angry if I was your friends.

    p.s. Portugal is DOPE; I wouldn’t rule it out so fast
    p.p.s. Morocco is hella safe/ as much so as Europe…their parents thinking sounds unconsciously informed by racism.

  6. more info is needed here. your ages matter a lot in this scenario, because if your friends legally can’t go without permission despite them wanting to i think YTA for sure. it’s cruel to exclude them when they don’t have any control in the matter.

    honestly overall despite the age i am leaning more towards YTA. sure, i understand that you all must really want to go to this specific destination. but this is supposed to be a trip for your friends as a group, isnt the whole point to share an experience together? isn’t this about the friendship itself, not the destination?

    you’re well within your rights to go on the trip without those two friends, but i wouldn’t blame them one bit for reconsidering your friendship after the fact. to go without them by choice is excluding them on purpose. you’re showing them that this is more important to you all than their feelings. it’s just not a nice thing to do, regardless of being “right” or “wrong”.

    maybe you’re not necessarily TA for going, but you’re definitely not good friends.

  7. The more people you get in a group to try to go away and do something, means that you’ll have a greater chance of the plans not fitting everyone’s schedules or money. NTA

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