I (18f) have been living with my housemate (30\~f) for around 3 months. yesterday i was talking in the living room with my other housemate (19f) and we got loud (loud enough to be heard from the rooms but not loud enough to be actually disturbing ) now id like to mention that housemate(30f) has a history of being very loud morning night all the time whenever shes home .. ok and she had music blasting from her room so we assumed she wasn’t trying to sleep but suddenly she screams at us that she wants to sleep which is totally understandable but why scream at us just tell us anyways id like to know if im the AH for not apologizing
You are not the asshole for not apologising because your housemate has a history of being loud herself and had music blasting, so her yelling was an unnecessarily aggressive way to communicate her need for quiet.
ESH. Sit down and set boundaries with each other.
I would be she lowkey ignores me when i try talking to her shes only willing to exchange hellos at most
ESH. She should have just asked, you should have just apologized. Basic courtesy is what makes living together work.
Put some house rules together and learn to be courteous to each other.
I would be she lowkey ignores me when i try talking to her shes only willing to exchange hellos at most
ESH. Communicate your roommate expectations, decide if there’s quiet hours or what to do if someone is trying to sleep. If she’s been bothering you with how loud she is the time to bring it up is not right after she calls you out for being noisy.
ESH. Maybe she had her music blasting to drown out your noise because she was trying to sleep? You can’t really gauge how loud you are to other people.
She should’ve communicated better, and you both need to sit down and set some ground rules. Otherwise, your stay together will be miserable for both parties.
Had her music blasting before we started talking