AITA for refusing to cook for my family’s christmas event?

Throwaway account because I’m pretty sure some of mt family scroll on reddit.

I (15f) really like baking and cooking food. Most of the time im making everyone little treats to try or im cooking dinner for my family from our background and it’s sort of one of mt love languages, often I’ll bring food to family events because my aunts and uncles are busy all the time and have little time to make food before they host parties and stuff and because im not working yet i have more time to make all this fun stuff.

So on Christmas we typically open presents at home then all have lunch and /or dinner at someone’s house. But this year my mum said we wouldn’t all be together. was a bit upset but was like alright, that’s fine with me. then my aunt calls me and asks me if I’ve thought of what food im making for christmas night. I asked what she meant and she told me she’s having a party and mt mum promised I’d make food for everyone. I didn’t really have a problem with that, as I said I love cooking and it was early notice. So I was just like “oh I’ll get ready at this time, and then I’ll have time to make the food”. She asked why I’d be getting ready.

She said it’s an “adult” party, but then I asked for more info and she mentioned cousins my age were going. So I was kind of upset and asked why I was the only one not going. She said my mum thinks I just not mature enough for a late party. I told her it honestly just sounded like an excuse. then I hung up. I went to my mum and she didn’t see a problem with me not going, but I told her there’s no way im putting effort into that if I’m being excluded. I started crying atp and it made my mum angry and she said i was being selfish and acting like a child.

I kept pressing for a proper reason but my mum kept saying “i dont want you going and im your mother so thats that”. My tone was very rude by this point because I was on the verge of tears and my mum said if I don’t make the food they’ll have to order food and I’ll inconviecne everyone. I said “then order it.” and ended the convo. I called my dad and hes saying he’ll come down to where I live and we can drive up to his for christmas so I can be with family that wants me there. So even if I wanted to help now I will be two hour drive away.

But basically they have no food plans for the party now. I suggested local chicken shops that do delivery, or even buying frozen food from the shops, but they’re saying they don’t wanna do that. While they didn’t want me there, I know everyone was counting on me for food and now from their persepctive im saying no and being selfish because I wanted to spend Christmas with dad. and im usually one to try see both sides but this is really difficult, cus ofc im biased and my feelings are hurt so outside persepctive would be nice. Thank u for any feedback 🙂 p.s sorry if this is confusing pls feel free to ask like extra things I didn’t mention im incredibly tired rn and may have left some details out.