I (15F) have a sister (20F). We usually have a good relationship. As I got older, she started trusting me with more personal things, and I tried my best to be a supportive younger sister, because she has always been an authority figure for me.
About a year ago, she started liking a guy. At first, I was genuinely happy for her and interested in hearing about it. But over time, I became the only person she talked to about him, constantly.
She overanalyzes everything: his social media, the girls whose posts he likes, how he looked at her, what he said. Every weekend when she comes home, she can talk for 2-3 hours straight, often retelling the same stories I’ve already heard many times. All our conversations eventually turn into talking about him.
She never asks if I’m okay with listening or if I have the energy for it. She just talks until someone interrupts.
The problem is that I’m usually exhausted. My weekends are very busy with schoolwork, tutors, and homework. By the end of the day, I’m mentally drained. When she talks for hours, I feel overwhelmed and sometimes even start crying from pure exhaustion. Afterward, I feel used and emotionally empty.
I feel guilty bringing this up because she says I’m the only person she can talk to and that no one else wants to listen. Whenever I try to say it’s hard for me to hear the same thing over and over, she guilt-trips me, and I end up listening anyway.
She also expects me to analyze everything with her and answer questions like: “Do you think we’ll be together?” or “What are the chances he’ll text me?” Any answer leads to even more analysis, and I feel trapped.
Because of this, I’ve started avoiding conversations with her entirely, afraid they’ll turn into the same topic again.
Today, she came up to me late in the evening and started talking about a quote that “really touched her.” I immediately knew it would lead back to him. I still had homework to do and genuinely couldn’t listen anymore, so I just replied vaguely, like “Okay, I get it.”
She got angry, slammed the door, and said she wouldn’t tell me anything ever again.
Now I feel extremely guilty, like I’m a bad sister and overreacting. At the same time, I feel emotionally overwhelmed, and no one in my family seems to notice how hard I’m struggling mentally.
So, AITA for not listening to my sister when she wanted support?
You definitely NTA, your exhausted and have homework to do. Listening to the same thing over and over again is so tiring. She seems obsessed with him, and it sounds a little concerning.
In fact, she thinks about him very often, but there are reasons why both she and I are sure that everything will work out for them. True, sometimes it crosses the line. My sister always overanalyses things and is very sensitive, which is why everything happens this way.