i run a badminton group on meetup, and it’s often fully booked with a waitlist. sometimes i make exceptions and allow people in although above capacity like for this one girl. a few weeks later, this girl is on the waitlist and texts me again if she can get an extra spot despite still being on the waitlist and the session start time is getting aproaching. I apologize and say that it’s unfortunately full. To my surprise, she arrives a little before the session starts and explains that before she sent the text she headed out to get to the court since it’s a longer trek for her, in case a spot opened up a little before the start time, and since she biked there she wasn’t able to see my response. I however was really frustrated and was very short and loud to her and in front of everyone else there, and said that if she she showed up again without notice she will be blocked. She said that there is no need to be loud since she was there to see if there will be an extra spot, and since it was before the game had started, that she would understand and head out if the answer was still no. Since I told her that I’ve made the exception, she went ahead and attended the game, and hasn’t repeated the offense since. The same girl still would continue to rsvp and would not approach me the same way as before. This happened summer last year, and today, she texted my co-host saying that she had been on the waitlist for an upcoming session, and noticed that we are letting other people through but not her, and asked for an explanation. I let me co-host inform her that my we tried to reach out to her regarding a password for the money transfer she had sent, to which she didn’t reply. I am the one that handles the money transfers and have the passowrds, so she said that since the app is a bit dated, she never got a notification about the text my co-host sent her, and since i am the one that usually handles the passwords and the deposit, that the co-host would eventually reach out to me and sort it out. she later said that no one reached out to her again to re-send the outstanding amount. she said it didn’t make sense on why we were waiting on her to reach out first about leaving her on the waitlist to address the outstanding amount that she had already sent, and expressed her frustration. Later in the day, another game event opened and she saved her and her friend a spot, which then i removed her from. Am I the asshole for holding her back on the waitlist, and removing her from the rsvp list for not paying an outstanding amount?
Yes but I doubt you care.
can you explain why?
Your “sentence” is not a sentence. I cannot decipher what you’re asking me
i fixed the typo
YTA. You publicly shamed her for a reaasonable assumption and then created a bureaucratic nightmare over a password issue that was likely your app’s fault, not hers. Blocking her for your own communicaation failures is a major overreaction.
YTA – i don’t think it’s fair to publicly make it into a whole thing when someone showed up despite being on the waitlist and i feel bad for her because she probably just wanted to be included. i also don’t find it fair to remove someone and put them back on the waitlist over an issue that was caused by the app you guys were using. i think this was all a misunderstanding that you took too far by blocking her on top of all that.
You sound like you have your little kingdom, and you are going to rule it. Absolute outrageous behaviour from yourself, and you know you ATA but you will convince yourself that we just don’t understand. I feel really sorry for the poor woman who just wanted to ve part of the group
Agreed OP. YTA. You should feel lucky people want to attend a badminton event at all, let alone someone who is putting in extra effort. If you’re going to create random bureaucracy at bare minimum post some rules somewhere so people can at least see how batsh*t cray cray they would have to be to join your group.
You appear to have gone out of your way to exclude her based on your personal dislikes. It appears very unprofessional and reeks of exclusivity. You hold a position which is important. Please behave accordingly. I apologise for having to explain in such a long winded fashion. I believe my initial response succinct.
Obviously YTA