Before i start off im sorry if i make any grammar mistakes, English is not my first language but i think im decent enough to write.
I (17F almost 18) and my brother(25) have an 8 year age gap and he has been seeing His gf (25F) for almost 9 years and they are currently with a child. A little back ground information His gf( let’s call her Z) had been expecting and my mother was planing a baby shower for her until the incident happened where Z texted my mom to cancel the baby shower, and ofc my mom expects the word and thinks she might have lost the baby until Z tells her what happed. Z first caught my brother cheating when they were trying to unblock one of my old phone that i forgot the password to. My brother added his icloud and messages from another girl showed and when Z asked him what it was he told her the truth. Me, my mom and my other brother do not condone cheating whatsoever so when we find out this is going on she sorta stop talking to him as much. Months go by, Z gives birth but before that and even after there were instances where we catch my brother lying or seeing his behavior coming off as odd even hiding photos of him and the other girl but at this point we don’t even know what to tell him. Any time we tell him to stop he doesn’t listen and just denies seeing the other woman. The second the Z caught him cheating was when the other girl called (lets call her H) H called Z telling her so much stuff about how my brother loves her more and how they wanna take the baby on a trip and Z is just flustered and asked my brother if all that H said was true and he agreed. Z told this story to my mom as she was dropping off all the gift she ever got from my brother and his clothes as well as mentioning how he’s been neglecting the baby and not going to take care of her. They break up and fast forward to today when they come over with the baby. My brother went to his room with the baby, and Z called me over to my kitchen. She asks me if my brother bought me and ipad and i was taken aback and told her no and asked her why. Z then proceeded to tell me how he told her he bought me an ipad and me knowing that those weird instances of us catching him were still going on. i didn’t know what to tell her and i was visibly upset. All i could muster up to tell her was im sorry and offering some water. 5 minutes go by and she tells my grandpa she’s leaving, soon my brother following after.my brother comes back ticked off but doesn’t say anything just grabs his keys and leaves. Z later texts me asking me if she could ask me a question without telling my brother and i said sure. she asks me if he’s with H right now and i just tell her most of the truth. On how he doesn’t talk to us as much anymore and how we don’t to him earth, how he leaves and stays out etc. I end the message with how we love her and the baby
I feel bad for Z and i know it’s not my business but i feel like i betrayed my brother which hurts me a lot. So am i the asshole?
NTA your brother is a dirt bag.
NTA. Your brother is ruining the relationship himself by not being faithful to Z. It’s not your job to lie for him.
NTA. Your brother ruined his own relationship. I think even your brother knows he’s an AH and you’re not.
NTA. Had this been my family, that brother would have been disowned LOL