About 3 years ago I found out I was pregnant with baby number 4. My now hsuands first baby. I had a car that would fit me and the kids easily and since my husband doesn’t ever really go anywhere with us, told him that for the time being this car would be fine for us. Before the baby was born he and his parents decided that I needed a different car. My husband brought it up multiple times but I told him until we could afford a new car, we’ll be ok with what we have. I was upsidedown on my car but was more than half way done paying it off.
My inlaws are very well off. Everything they have was paid with cash. I got a call from my husband one day that his parents gave him $20,000 for a new car and he got one and needed me to come sign the paperwork. I told him again that I didn’t want to because it wasn’t our money and I didn’t want to have to pay anyone back. He said it would all be fine and just come sign the paperwork, the car was already ours. After fighting over this for over a year I was tried so I came by and signed the paperwork.
Not only was this a car that we couldn’t afford, but it wasn’t even one I wanted for my family. He and his parents picked out the car. Fast forward to now, my husband and his parents are expecting me to pay back the $20,000 that they gave him for the car with our tax return. I use the tax return to pay off other debts that came up throughout the year, credit cards, paying a little extra on the car payments, that kind of stuff. I did save up about $1000 one time and gave it to them but they told me that they wanted larger payments and that every time tax season came around to just give them that.
Am I wrong for telling my husband that since he and his parents decided to do this and since they’re well off, they can wait or he can pay them back? My kids, my family comes first, not his parents who have plenty.
Feel like this is missing context. If everything here is EXACTLY as you have presented it, NTA. The parents offered you a gift that you didn’t want and are now upset that you took it.
It’s not a gift if you have to pay it back
That’s why I think NTA
Yeah. Strictly with the details you presented, I would not pay them back at all. It is husband’s debt if it’s anyone’s, and if he doesn’t like it you should run past him the cost of paying a surrogate to bear your child. That is what he owes you if you owe them. NTA
NTA. Edited to add after Info given.
Info needed. Can I ask why your husband isn’t the one paying off the car? What is his reasoning that you are the one who needs to pay it off? Didn’t his parents give the money to him?
I’m slightly confused here. Did they put it under your name? Why did he absolutely had to have you come sign the paperwork? Why didn’t he just sign it and have the car, and you use it as needed when you are all together, and you keep your car and use it when you can or have him use it? Cause that what I would have done.
I hope for you that what you signed was not a loan between you and his parents for 20k. If it was not. Don’t pay anything. This is between your husband and his parents.
And take the argument that his parents have plenty off the table. It’s not relevant and also doesn’t sound accurate if they’re trying to fleece you for money.
NtA
But be careful. Sounds like it’s you and your kids.. vs your husband and his parents.
INFO: What papers did you sign exactly? Was it to put the title in your name? Was it a loan agreement with his parents? Is his name on the car too?
Not the title, that’s all in his name. It was so that I was the second person on the car.
Nope nope nope. Tell dear husband (and his parents) that since HE was the one who accepted the money and HE was the one (with his parents) to pick out the car (that you didn’t even WANT), HE can pay them back. Don’t give them a dime. They can try to sue all they want. Title is in HIS name…it’s his car. A judge would rule in your favor (to not have to pay it back).
What does ‘on the car’ mean if not the title?
You know tax returns are just 0 % loans you give the government, right?
I’d definitely check to make sure you’re withholding the correct amount.
My husband would lose his mind if we were getting back 20k a year. That’s $ that could be sitting in a hysa all year
Give back the car. Let them sell it to get back their money. If they lost money on the deal, too bad. They shouldn’t have bought it.
Kind of simple.
Give them back the car and do not pay them anything. They presented it as a gift so why are you now paying for it. Why isn’t your husband paying for it?