Hi, basically I have decided that this girl I was friends with isn’t a good friend, and I’ve decided that we shouldnt have a close relationship, but I’m willing to be friendly.
She makes me into someone I can’t even look at in the mirror. She trash talks me behind my back and is so two faced.
Anyways, a friend said that maybe I should cut her some slack because yesterday her mum miscarried last night, but she spent all day yesterday having a go so that happened before she found out.
I understand her being upset and I wouldn’t wish what happened on anyone, but she distracts her self from everything that is happening by bullying others. She is being bullied and her mum is struggling to have a baby but surely that doesn’t mean what she is doing is right? Surely I shouldn’t be judged for taking control of the situation?
AITA?
Edit: Spelling mistakes
Her mom’s miscarriage has nothing to do with her overall character (or lack of, as the case may be) as a person. If you don’t get along you don’t get along. NTA
NTA. Nobody is entitled to be in your life. You always have the choice.
NTA you should cut her off
That said, getting bullied herself + now the miscarriage makes me wonder how shitty her school life and now home life must be. No idea how old you guys are, you sound like you’re in high school still, so its not like she has the maturity to realize what she’s doing.
Not enough info to judge her fully, want to give the benefit of the doubt based on what’s here anyway
To be honest she’s had a rough, but that’s not to say I haven’t had it rough aswell she knows about it. But like for example I’ll be talking about my grandad who passed away and she’ll be like “Don’t talk about they because mine also passed away” and then turn it around onto herself. She also tends to trauma dump on me which just brings my mood down. It’s also just been Christmas and her mum got her tons of stuff and she’s already broken half of it on purpose cause she didn’t want it, she’s put stress on her mum by making her do all the house work and now helping with it when she asks and she can be a bit of a bratty girl
NTA. You need to protect your own peace.
NTA. Her poor behavior didn’t just start yesterday so her mom’s miscarriage (while sad) is irrelevant.
Funny, her mom’s miscarriage hasn’t stopped her from being two faced so how should it stop you from being mad at her?
Sorry about the loss though.
Cut both friends
NTA- Don’t be friendly with her. If she’s gonna be rude behind your back, let her know you know she’s a snake and you want NOTHING to do with her. Don’t be fake back: you don’t like her either, so don’t pretend. You don’t have to go insult her or be mean just because, but if you give an inch she’ll take a mile and use any closeness to you against you. The farther you get, the better, and it’ll probably be good to not beef with her for a while if you can.
Be polite, not friendly. You don’t want to chat, and you don’t like the way she talks about you, and you don’t want to be friends. Let her know the jig is up you don’t want someone in your circle who talks about you like she does.
NTA, her moms miscarriage has nothing to do with her behavior over time. Unless her moms been having a miscarriage every day for as long as she’s been an ass to you………..
You never have to have anyone in your life that you don’t want there anymore. Shes acting out for a reason and she needs pro help, but you aren’t required to be her victim while she gets help.
NTA. Don’t even be friendly with her. If she is as mean as you say, distance yourself from her as completely as you can. Also that friend who told you to cut her some slack is also odd.
NTA. I’m not sure how those things are related.
NTA. But why is the friend asking you to back off and be nicer if you haven’t, in fact, backed off previously