i work a remote corporate job, lately one of my coworkers has been making every singles morning incredibly awkward. instead of just giving status updates, she spends 10 minutes talking about her messy breakup or health issues. yesterday was the breaking point we were already behind on a project and she started crying about her cat while we were trying to discuss deadlines. i private messaged her and said hey im sorry youre going rhought it, but can we keep this for later? i have to add its not only in our free time. this is starting to mess with our productiviry and its a lot to handle first thin gin the morning, she didnt relpy but she went staight to our manager and now he says i lack empathy and that i should be more of a team player ??? this is SUS and weird cuz we can lose our jobs if we dont meet the deadline and he is not even focusing on that . im nervous.
You are not a therapist, this is affecting your mental health and your work negatively. If your boss is so worried about it, he can listen to her or set her up with some mental health resources.
NTA. She needs to find a support system to vent and sort this out to, not one of her coworkers when she needs to do her job too. This is something she should tell family or close friends when they all have the time.
INFO: is this a group call or just the two of you?
INFO: You said that your work remotely, but that this is happening in your free time? How about you don’t log on until your shift start time so that your aren’t online during your “free time”?
Without any other context, I would say NTA – you work to work, not listen to your co-worker’s sob story. It sounds like you were sensitive in your private message. I would be straight with your boss about the impact on productivity, and also reinforce that you WERE empathetic in your message – that your intention was to HELP THE TEAM. If that doesn’t make you a team player, I don’t know what does.
Honestly she is the asshole for going right to your manager. I hope you were able to explain the situation thoroughly from your perspective since there are always 2 sides to every story.
NTA I would reach out to your boss or HR and explain your side of things with the receipts that show her spending work time going on about personal matters. Show that the bottom line is being impacted by her private matters. If you have a well-documented timeline of events that show that this is more than a one-off incident, any reasonable company would be looking at her to get with the program. If the company tries to blame you in any way then I’d get myself a free consult with an attorney and find out my legal rights.
NTA
Work is work. Her issues are not your responsibility.
If she needs help/time off, that is on her to pursue. It is definitely not your responsibility.
NTA.
Take it to HR. Straight to that. Bring proof. Screenshots are difficult to doctor so they’re most reliable, only second to video recording. She needs to learn and remember that work life and home life are meant to be separate and her bringing them together constantly is causing productivity issues. That’s not fair to you or anyone else on the team.
Someone else has mentioned she has weaponized her emotions. I agree with this, especially with her going to the manager.
Whoa. That last bit makes me feel like you need to talk to a manager now. Or HR at least.
Sympathize, but redirect to work topics.
Ask Manager how many hours per day he wants you to devote to personal chatting so you can schedule appropriately.
NTA
NTA
work meetings aren’t group therapy. everyone has stuff going on but there’s a time and place for it, especially when deadlines are tight. you didn’t tell her to shut up, you just asked to keep it for later so you could focus. that’s not lacking empathy, that’s trying to do your job.
You’re her co-worker not her therapist. Explain to your manager her personal life is interfering with your work deadlines and productivity. I’m sure your manager will understand. NTA
NTA
There is a massive difference between being a team player and being an unpaid, involuntary therapist.