AITA for telling my supervisor of a situation with co-workers I am 47f and my 40f coworker got into a discussion today.
I’m not sure if I’m the asshole or not.
We both had interviews Friday for the same position, actually like 9 of us did. While on the phone with my friend let’s call her Ana, she got a text from our third coworker let’s call her Cindy, that if she can give her the interview questions after she had the interview. We both agreed that it wasn’t something she was going to do as we are all interviewing for the same position! I told my supervisor that it was bugging me. I knew Ana didn’t give her the questions, not 100% but like 99.9%. Well and went off on me and said awful things that I did screen shot. Am I the asshole?
INFO: Are there multiple positions open? Interviewing 9 people for 1 open position is a lot. At least it would be in my industry and current company.
It’s not a lot in my field of data analysis and digital solutions in healthcare. Finding 9 internal candidates, though, would be a rarity…still, if someone internal applies, I like to interview them if only to give them the experience (even if they aren’t qualified) and have a chat about development needs.
NTA for telling your supervisor. You raised what you likely believed was unethical behaviour and was flagging someone who was trying to cheat the process. That speaks volumes about the other person, not you.
How you presented it matters, though. Framing it as an opportunity to seek clarity or confirmation is one way. Framing it as ratting someone out, does give “looking out for yourself” vibes which matches Cindy’s.
Unfortunately, you left out a perspective in your original post and I’m hoping you will go back and update it. “Well and went off…” Who went off? Your supervisor? Ana? Cindy?
I had the weekend to think about it, I feel we are all prepared for the next position unless there are multiple positions. I only let him know it wasn’t asked to me but it made me feel uncomfortable knowing that information. And sorry first time posting here Ana went off on me.
Did you talk to Ana first and let her know you were thinking of reporting it?
It was her text conversation, not yours.
YTA. Involving your supervisor is petty, and I think you’re aware of that. You only told the supervisor because you thought this gave her an edge against you. The fact of the matter is, she can’t cheat on an interview. Would she be more prepared? Probably, but that doesn’t matter. You acted like a teenager by telling your supervisor.
INFO: You missed a step. How would anyone know what you said to your supervisor?
YTA. You want the job so quit trying to come off as a morally superior.
YTA
There’s nothing wrong with trying to prepare yourself for an interview as much as you can.
My job was just hiring for an opening thays the same as my position and I was happy to talk to candidates that wanted to know the kinds of things I’d been asked when I interviewed.
Ana is also ok to refuse, if she thinks it gives a leg up, but its not unethical to ask and you’re petty for going to your boss over it.
YTA. Totally acceptable for you to not tell them the interview questions, everyone should get a fair and equal shot at the interview. You were wrong for telling the supervisor. Your coworker didn’t do anything explicitly against the rules (I assume) and it comes off as you snitching on her to make you look better.
YTA
There was no need for you to take this to your supervisor. What your colleague did wasn’t anything illegal. She was just trying to prep for the interview. If you your friend didn’t want to give her the questions that is perfectly fine. But unless there was some sort of policy in place not to share anything regarding interview questions, it doesn’t make you look good.
YTA. You saw an opportunity to make both Ana and Cindy look bad and you jumped on it. Neither of them did anything actually wrong, but you passed along a conversation between them that you weren’t even a part of in a way that made them look shady.
If you’re all applying for a new position within your own workplace, the interview isn’t even that important. What matters most is your performance in your current position and your relationships with your team. So congrats on nuking some of those relationships and letting Ana and Cindy know they can’t trust you, I guess.
I’m not going to enter a judgement here but I will say that jobs should offer the interview questions BEFORE the interview so that people can think about their answers.
Yta. As someone who has been the interviewer in this situation let me give you a rundown of how this looks to me:
1) Cindy is a concern. She is putting others in a difficult position to get herself ahead. I don’t know what the role your interviewing for is but I generally don’t like that behaviour because it could translate into unethical behaviour when managing staff or undermining managers.
2) Ana shared a personal text with you and used it to change your perspective of a coworker. If anyone should have reported Cindy’s behaviour it should have been her, but (presumably) she didn’t even though she felt it was inappropriate. I’d be concerned that shows a willingness to turn a blind eye to bad behaviour on the job. However, it’s good she didn’t cave and share the questions.
3) you took third hearsay information (assuming you didn’t see the texts, only got told about them) and used it to make your completion look bad. You can’t supply evidence of this apparent wrong doing so your supervisor has only your word that it actually happened. To me, this seems like someone who’s likely to be a busy body and cause a lot of run around that can’t actually be resolved.
Of If I was the interviewer and had all this info, I’d probably skip all three of you if I have another 6 candidates. You seem like drama.