My (F22) husband (M22) works about 20 mins away from where we live. We live near the Rocky Mountains and his work is up one of the canyons in a city. Today he put the car keys in his back pack and accidentally locked his backpack in the car. We only have one car and no spare key. My husband lets me know that he has done this and is reaching out to AAA. They tell him that unfortunately he’s already used up all of services and that they cannot help him.
So my husband of course calls me back and asks what we can do. I am not working today so I told him I would reach out to my family to see if they’d be willing to take me up to him with an air wedge and help.
This to me seems reasonable. He is my husband, he’s stranded and doesn’t have anyone else to help him and we don’t exactly have the money for a locksmith or an Uber.
I reached out to my nana as she lives up the street and typically lets me borrow her car. Her immediate reaction was to say no and tell me she doesn’t understand why I “save him so much” because “he’s a grown man and should be able to figure this out without me,” and this is too much on me and I shouldn’t be doing it. We argued because to me I am a wife and he is my husband and it’s not a big deal for me to go up there. She told me he should be able to find a different solution because what would he do if I wasn’t around? To which I responded well I am around and if I wasn’t I’m sure he would come up with something else, but I am around and I’m his wife so what’s the big deal?
So I guess now I’m reaching out to Reddit… because is this not something a wife should be doing? Am I saving him or just being a wife?
(Just adding this in because some are confused, this is not normal behavior for my nana, she typically adores my husband and speaks very highly of him. And we used all of the original AAA this year on my husbands truck, it kept having problems and we needed a few tows. We have since replaced the truck for the car 🙂 thank you for all of your responses! I appreciate all the questions and feedback)
Sounds like Nana has some info we don’t, but nah – NTA.
Have him call a local lock-out service and have him pay to undo his mistake? Nana has nothing to do with this.
Marriage is a partnership so yes you do help each other out – multiple times if necessary. The question is why is nana so snarky about your husband? Why does she feel he is incompetent?
As for you – NTA.
INFO: Does he need to be rescued often? How has he used AAA so much that they refuse to come out?
tbf, you only get four service calls a year to AAA under basic membership plans.
I mean I don’t think he does, but maybe I’m missing something? And towards the beginning of the year he had a truck that continuously broke down due to engine problems, but that truck is now gone and we have a different car.
INFO…is your husband literally waiting on the side of the road right now?
No he’s not on the side of the road, he is at his work, but I am on my way to him with my Dad.
AAA allows 4 calls a year for free. After that they charge. So, it seems you’ve left out a bit of info because, to me, 4 calls a year is a lot. Have you asked Nana several times to borrow the car to help out your husband? She’s probably seeing a pattern here.
Has he asked any coworkers to help him?
Yes, he has one other coworker with him at the moment, but his coworker wouldn’t be able to help him until 4 once they’re closed up. My husband is off at 11 so I’ve got my dad to help me get they key out
INFO: How has he already used up all of the AAA calls? I don’t know anyone who has ever used their allotted calls & I have a lot of ADHD people in my circle (myself included). So what does your grandma know that we don’t?
I didn’t realize AAA gave you limits.
How many times is it that they will help you?
What did he do to need them all those other times?
NAH Your Nana is just looking out for you.
Your husband does sound a bit flaky.
He needs a spare key. Everyone does. There are ways to get them more cheaply than going through a dealer.
NTA. Your nana doesn’t have to let you borrow her car, but it’s perfectly reasonable for you to want to help in this situation.