So I’ve got these two neighbors, we’ll call them Amanda and Blair. Amanda is in her mid 90s i believe, she has very limited mobility and not much in the way of company outside of her dog. The thing is the dog needs some daily exercise but Amanda isn’t able to walk the dog. That’s where Blair comes in, she’s also older but is a couple decades younger than Amanda and has much greater mobility, Blair has always been very active.
Blair goes on multiple walks around the neighborhood most days and when she learned of Amanda’s dog/mobility situation, she offered to take the dog on regular walks throughout the day, which at first made Amanda very happy.
Blair goes out of town from time to time for various reasons, holidays, family stuff, the usual. When she goes out of town she started asking me to take the dog on the daily walks and slides me a couple bucks for it. I’d do it for free but she insists and it isn’t much money, usually between $5-$20 depending on how many days I walk the dog.
At first I would go over to Amanda’s house and chit chat with her for a few minutes then take the dog for a walk around the block, bring the pupper back home and give em’ a treat, chit chat a couple more minutes then repeat a few hours later.
The dog had been allowed to roam during the middle of the day, he never went far, always came back, and what little traffic there is couldn’t go fast if they wanted to. I wouldn’t want my dog roaming, but it’s not my dog and our area doesn’t have any laws against it. Blair isn’t comfortable with dogs roaming freely either. The risk is low but still present.
Over the course of about a year things seemed to change somewhat. The dog got used to Blair and would go over to her house to visit during some of these outings, more and more often Blair would specify the dog would need to be picked up from her house if it wasn’t the first or last walk of the day. Blairs gate would be shut but it’s got fairly wide gaps and the dog is pretty small so I thought the dog could just slip through if he wanted.
Recently though Amanda has made a couple comments indicating that she didn’t much appreciate Blair keeping her dog away from her all day when he’s her dog and Blair isn’t even going to be there. I can’t remember her exact words but she has NOT been vague about the sentiment.
Where I’m feeling conflicted is in following Blairs instructions for walking the dog and taking the money for it. On the one hand I do want to help my kind elderly neighbor with taking care of her dog, on the other hand, i feel like what I’m actually doing is keeping her dog away from her.
For a bit of added context Blair has always had dogs until a couple of years ago and since then she has also given my dogs treats and encouraged them to come to her house when they’ve gotten out of the yard, even after the first time I asked her to stop.
I don’t understand.
i had to read it several times, too. I think I figured out the issue, which is not really OP walking the dog. It’s the other neighbor keeping the dog in her yard so it isn’t running loose in traffic.
So it seems like OP is only the fill-in dogwalker? If old lady doesn’t like the set up she should tell other old lady.
Walking the dog is a kindness that Amanda seems to appreciate. That’s great. Nobody is TA.
If Amanda doesn’t like that someone is keeping her dog safe after he has been left to run in traffic, however slow that traffic might be, she’s TA.
If she doesn’t like it, she can keep her dog safe inside so that kind neighbors don’t feel the need to protect him.
You’re NTA for walking Amanda’s dog but you need to stop taking the dog to Blair’s house. It sounds like she is keeping the dog from Amanda who probably isn’t capable of getting it back if she isn’t capable of walking the dog. Possibly help Amanda keep the dog confined to her yard? The dog is Amanda’s company, not Blair’s and it is unfair that Blair is keeping it away from Amanda and you shouldn’t be assisting her to do so.
The dog belongs to Amanda so it does not feel right to help Blair low-key purloin Amanda’s dog. At the same time, why is Amanda letting her dog roam around if she wants its company? Or is it rather that the dog escapes her house?
I’m not sure it’s legal for you to follow Blairs instructions when she’s not the dog owner and is doing something you know the owner isn’t happy with.
Hard to make a judgment here.
With your own dogs, I would make it clear to Blair that if your dogs get loose, she is to return them to you if she finds them, not take them back to her own
ESH except for Amanda. You shouldn’t be taking the dog anywhere without Amanda’s permission and instructions.
Ask Amanda if she wants you to walk her dog. If she says yes, help. If she says no, don’t. She gets to make that call, no one else.