This is my first time posting here and sorry for the misspels, I am not an native English speaker.
I (34 F) have been with my husband (42) for 18 years. This year I will undergo surgery for the second time in my life. The first time, I came out of the anesthesia very confused, so I’m very nervous about the upcoming operation. My husband has taken the day of the surgery off to take me and pick me up. However, this procedure has a six-week recovery period; I’m not allowed to lift anything or exert myself too much. I also have no idea how the recovery will go because stories vary widely; some feel well again after a few days, while others experience discomfort for three weeks. I asked my husband to be available to take our son (10) to school for at least the first two days after the surgery. He arranged this perfectly.
He recently came home, and he has to be away for work for four days after my surgery to attend a course. He says the course can’t be rescheduled. Now I feel quite abandoned and alone, and I’m practically ignoring him because I want him to be available to take care of me or our son in case I won’t be able to. But I wonder if I can expect more from my husband or is he already doing enough/everything to take care of me?
AITA for ignoring him now because I think he can do more for me?
Taking your kid to school is the bare minimum. He won’t even be doing that when he goes on his work trip. Is his work that shitty that he can’t reschedule or even take time off to care for you as you recover?
Is your surgery elective?
that’s ~ irrelevant ~
It does matter, she could have scheduled it around the course if truly it can’t be rescheduled.
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He is the child’s father. He’s not the mother’s helper.
NTA! You requested something 100% understandable. After going through a medical procedure and being “incapacitated”, he should be taking care of the family. I’m pretty sure that you have taken care of the family by yourself in several occasions.
NTA, you clearly arranged this with him prior so he should have rescheduled this course ages ago and taking kids to school should be the absolute bare minimum since he is also the child’s father.
OP is entitled to her feelings but silent treatment does not help anyone. Some courses can’t be rescheduled. Maybe family can come for a couple of days to help or parents of a school mate can give the son a ride.
Tell him to call him mother and ask her for advice about how to schedule care for you. I pretty much guarantee she will read him the riot act. What is wrong with him? Enlist his family and friends to set him right. Geez!
so, your husband got with a 16yo child as a grown ass 24yo man? yeah, no wonder he’s an asshole. find some better people to spend your time with. NTA.
Yeah..I noticed the ages too. Gross.