My girlfriend(22) is upset with me(23) because I wanted to go to the gym today, which is our 3-month anniversary. Actually, tomorrow is our anniversary, but it’s also my board game night that I go to every Sunday so she said we was okay with moving the anniversary to today to accommodate. I then told her that I wanted to go to the gym today because it’s been awhile and she got upset with me because she said today was a special day and I didn’t seem to care. I told her I was only planning on going to the gym when she was asleep anyways since she was going to sleep in and she said to just do what I want and it was clearly upset with me.
I told her that since I haven’t gone to the gym in a while, I feel like I’m out of shape and it makes me feel good when I’m in shape and people give me compliments and it helps with my confidence. She said she loves me how I am and her opinion is the only one that should matter and that I shouldn’t care where other people think. I reiterated that I also go to the gym for me because it makes me feel better but she said that shouldn’t matter.
I would also like to say that I don’t know any couples who celebrate their anniversary every month, and she seems to be hurt by the fact that I don’t think about our anniversary as a monthly thing. Apparently this is normal to her though.
The argument got a little bit bigger when I said I also feel like she doesn’t support me when I want to spend time with my friends and she got upset that I told her that even after I said that I was just telling her how she makes me feel.
Edit: I spend the night at her place every night and we basically live together
It’s been a while since you’ve been to the gym. What’s one more day?
How old are you guys? Do you live together & going to have the whole day together? I saw you said you’re going to only go when she’s asleep.
Regardless of answers, NTA in the slightest
NTA
I need ages here, because no fucking way anyone over 25 is taking a 3 month anniversary that seriously.
I get the 3 month anniversary might not be a thing for you (me neither for that matter) but it is for her. What stood out for me is you seemed to want everything your way: board game night, the gym but if you haven’t been to the gym in a while, does it matter if you wait 2 more days? It comes across as you don’t want to spend time with her. If it’s cause the anniversary isn’t something you want to celebrate, communicate that but you’re coming across a bit selfish.
What are your ages? 3 months is not an anniversary
I mean I also think it’s a bit immature to celebrate a 3 month anniversary but at the same time, you haven’t went to the gym in a while so you pick the one day she wanted to set aside is a bit inconsiderate.
I can’t bring myself to really call either of you an AH, just not on the same page.
If the gym was in your normal routine and she was asking you to change that, I’d be more sympathetic to you. I guess ESH cause neither of those things should be that important in context.
Oh ffs.
Dude, your gf makes ME exhausted just by reading this little snippet of your life around her. Do you really want to be badgered by “It’s the fifth anniversary of the night we first held hands and you don’t wanna be with MEEEEEEEEEE!”?
You’re looking into the future right now. Decide if that’s how you wanna live.
From his post history, it seems like OP is only staying with her because he wants to fuck her, but she wants to wait til marriage. It’s all a bit fucked up.
3 *month* anniversary? Are you guys 15?
There’s a lot to unpack here…like her telling you her opinion about you is the only one that matters, even superseding your own…but I’m just going to throw away the suitcase instead. ESH
NTA.
Okay, aside from the fact that no one that has graduated high school celebrates 3 month anniversaries, why can you spend *most* of the day with her? How long does going to the gym take, an hour or two? If she’s upset about not spending every moment of the day with you then things will not get easier.
NTA. 3 months…seriously? An anniversary is an annual event.
INFO… how old are y’all? This feels like very teenage drama…
Celebrating every month is a bit silly but it also seems pretty important to her, and I would guess that going to the gym is not really the problem, it’s the fact that you are pretty clearly not as jazzed about it as she is.
NAH but maybe different priorities.
How old are you?
Are you 13? Why are you celebrating a 3 month anniversary?
Ive been with my husband for 14 years, married for about 5.5 months. Anniversaries are for when youve actually hit a milestone. 1 month, 2 months, even 6 months, arent anything, this is silly. NTA