I have been living with my roommates (couple) for over a year now. We get along well and have become fast friends. Historically, they have had 2 cats in the house which are quite easy to take care of and I have looked after them for 2 weeks at a time when they were on vacation. These are not my cats and my roommates had them before I even lived in the house.
Recently my roommates have decided to get a third cat and its been taking a toll on me. This cat is quite old and has the tendency to poop/vommit all over the place. Because of this new addition my roommates also now have 2 litter boxes in the apartment which is harder to clean. In 2025, my rommates went on a trip and I had to take care of the cats for a week. This new cat, as I was feeding her, scratched me pretty agressively and I have been a little scared of her since. Now they are off again for the weekend and whilst they have tried to minimise the time I had to take care of the cats i.e. trying to clean the litter in the early morning before they left, I have still been left exhuasted by the cats.
One of them vommitted all over the couch and the other pooped all over the floor. The older cat (new addition) also has to be encouraged for her to eat her food, e.g. in their note they reminded me to bring her the food bowl after shes eaten the first time because she has a short attention span. I have had to hang around at least 30mins when i feed them just so I can coax her to eat.
Overall I just find myself exhausted and resentlful at having to take care of 3 cats especially when they are vommitting and pooping all over the living room. Am I the asshole if I tell them next time I would prefer not to take care of the cats. I know they try their best to find alternatives and I might the last option but even then I would like to politely decline. I just feel like if I decline I am a bad roommate and friend and I dont want to ruin our friendship when we get along so well.
TLDR: AITA if I tell my roommates I can take care of their 3 cats.
I think it all boils down to what are your rights in this house. I write this because if you want, you can tell them that you will not be taking care of them any more and that they should be the ones cleaning litters, cleaning floors, and sofas and so on. But if you are not in a good position (i.e. you can be evocted because you are not on the lease) I think that it gets messier.
Its a NTA for me, not your pet(s), not your responsabilities.
NTA “Sorry room mates but while I was originally OK with looking after 3 cats, with the addition of the new older cat and t here being significantly more work and having to clean up faeces vomit and taking extra time to look after their needs, I am going to have to entirely step back from looking after them. I ask that if you absolutely have to be away that they go to a pet sitter or cattery for the time you’re away as I will not be cleaning litter boxes etc from now on. Thank you for understanding, as these are not my animals to care for”
\*2 Cats
NTA. Not your pets, not your responsibility. You can surely be polite about it, but if they start to complain then take the highway and tell them that they shouldn’t have taken more responsibilities if they can’t shoulder it or if they force you anyways, threaten to drop the cats to the shelter.
If roommate contact specified that, when they’re away, you’re obliged to take care of their cats, then you’d be TA for trying to get out of your agreement. Otherwise, NAH. It’s fine that they assume you’re okay doing it if you haven’t spoken up. It’s fine if you speak up and refuse.
“Exhausted” is a strong word!
You don’t need to spend ages coaxing the cat to eat. If it’s hungry enough it will eat. And if it misses one meal then it will be fine, just like we would be -hungry, maybe a bit cranky, but fine- and it’s unlikely to be able to shit and vomit. Win-win.
It’s only a weekend trip so I think 1. You’re taking the task too seriously and 2. You would be a huge AH if you refused
NTA but would you really rather prefer someone you may or may not know very well coming into your place to look after the cats? Because there is a good chance that is what will happen if you refuse to watch them moving forward. My old roommates used to leave me with actually 20 pets to watch between cats, birds, dogs, lizards etc. (her boyfriend just kept bringing animals home without consulting anybody) when they’d go away and between feedings, cleaning, and spending time with them it would take about 5 hours of my day but the alternative was having some random pet sitter I didn’t know in my space.
NTA. Even though you did it during their previous trips when they only had 2 cats, they now have 3, and it seems as though the new addition takes a lot of extra time and care. You didn’t get the new cat; you’re not responsible for it. If what used to be a favor done willingly because you liked them and got along with their kitties is now feeling like a burden, and generating resentment, just let them know this was the last time you’re willing to provide unpaid pet sitting while they travel. Also, from my point of view, you would be well within your rights to insist that both the sofa and the floor be thoroughly cleaned and sanitized after they get back, preferably by a professional service. (Out of curiosity, whose sofa is it? Also, did they talk to or consult with you at all before they acquired the third cat?)
NTA you don’t have to do anything you do want to do. Their pets their responsibility.
NTA. Yuk! Poop and vomit on a regular basis? I think you are justified moving out immediately. You didn’t sign up for that. 🤮