So my daughter started school last Wednesday, and the teacher asked us to send pull-ups, wipes, and a change of clothes for her. I sent quite a few pull-ups, and a brand new pack of wipes, and an outfit as requested. Only the bottoms for her outfit came back, and I saw another student from her class, wearing her shirt when I went to pick her up. Now, I don’t mind if the teacher needs to use some of my daughter’s pull-ups for the other kids, or even some of her wipes. I’ll send extra of those things if needed because I understand what it’s like to be the parent that can’t provide that. However, when it comes to her clothes, I’m not OK with sharing. For starters, if they get sent home on a kid (like the shirt did) then there’s a chance that the school won’t get it back, and clothes are really expensive and I can’t afford to replace them like that. It all pretty much boils down to the fact that my daughter doesn’t really have that many clothes to begin with, so I can’t really afford for them to get ruined, or for them not to get sent back. So, I’m just curious if it would make me the asshole if I talk to her teacher the next day that she goes to school, and tell her that I’m not comfortable with her using her clothes for other children.
First of all, NTA. Thats the right thing to do, that your child things. it is for your daughter not for others. Second, respect. She should ask if it is ok to share it to others, even though it is common sense that no one want to say something like that to other children.
NTA. They shouldn’t be sharing items like that. I understand some parents might not pack enough, but what if you can only just afford what you pack. The centre needs to fix this issue within themselves, not with what is packed for other kids.
NTA
I worked in childcare for 10 years and would never have put clothes from one child on a non-related (direct sibling in the same household) child.
Speak to the room leader, and speak to someone above. Ask them to contact the family of the child who was wearing your daughters clothes to be returned.
NTA. Clothes are too expensive and they grow out of them too fast for us not to get every cent worth of wear out of them. It also though, could have been a mistake made by one of the teachers.
NTA. It’s wildly inappropriate for the school to be giving away your property. If it were me, I’d be raising it with the teacher and the head of the facility. As you say, sharing the pull ups and wipes is one thing but clothes is totally another.
I’m petty, too, so I might be the kind of person who sends spare clothes festooned with my child’s name and a massive tag inside saying ‘Property of $Child’s name, if found please return to/please call XXZ’.
NTA- that’s not acceptable.
That is so inappropriate, if the child had no clothes and the school has no back up clothes they pphone the parent. They definitely shouldn’t take another child’s clothes. What would happen if they gave her clothes away and she had an accident and needed them??
OP is NTA. Every school should gave an extra set of clothes in the event a parent is unprepared.
I had a student with a huge nosebleed one time, and she got it all over her dress. We gave her an oversized school shirt that fit like a dress, but it was better than nothing. It was one of those standard shirt blanks schools use with their custom logo on it. Not a uniform per se. The expectation was that the parent washes it, and returns it to the school when they’re done.
NTA. The teacher had no right to do that, whatever item you sent your kid with is only exclusively should be for your kid alone. That teacher needs to be talked to and if possible, go over her head and inform a higher authority about that incident, to ensure it never happens again and for proper documentation.
NTA depending on how you approach it. I’d probably say to the teacher I noticed that my daughter’s clothes weren’t all returned in her pack, and that I think I saw her tee on another child. Ask what happened, it might have been a genuine mistake that someone grabbed the wrong pack. Basically give them a chance to explain. If they say yeah we put whatever clothes on whichever kid, then I’d be asking them not to do that.
Our daycare used wipes, diapers and pull ups as needed – but the clothes, I’d be mad if they have her clothes away. NTA.
NTA. Maybe there was a mixup but it should still be addressed. It would have been less awkward if you brought it up immediately but it’s still a valid concern. I’d also suggest labeling them from now on just to be safe. maybe even putting them in a zip lock with their name on it as well. Personally I would be upset on either end of the spectrum loosing the clothes and having someone else’s childs clothes put on my child not knowing what is made of, what detergent was used, if they are even clean, ect
NTA they should never put a child’s clothing on another child. Please speak to teachers.
NTA, and honestly, I wouldn’t EVER tell the school you are OK with any other stuff being used either. Speak to the principal.
The parents need to supply, and if they can’t or won’t then the school needs to handle it. “Emergencies” happen (e.g. sick child means more changes than usual needed) and schools/nurseries themselves should be prepared – keep spare pullups, and clothes in various sizes – it’s not like baby/toddler clothes are in short supply at charity shops and clean and decent is all that’s needed. They can then work out billing any costs to the parents involved. Stay out of it and shut down that entitlement instantly with a strongly worded email (get it in writing).