Context: after we had a conversation earlier this week about how we were financially tight, he checks his venmo account and has over $900 saved up in it. He uses it for various things and wanted to start redecorating the upstairs loft.
Somehow, after we have the convo about both of us being tight on money THATS when he wants to start using this Venmo account to do something he’s been wanting for his house (he owns).
In the last couple of days, he found a new entertainment center that is a fireplace speaker and TV stand. The fireplace does change colors and apparently the speaker is Bluetooth. It was everything he was looking for, but it cost $300.
Fast-forward to today, he tries negotiating with the poster and he will only take $300 cash. So he messages me and asked me to take the cash out out of my account and he will just Venmo me the 300.
When I told him no and asked why he can’t just take the $300 out of his account. He says that he wants to just use it out of the Venmo money and that he doesn’t know how to transfer the Venmo balance to a bank account
So I proceed to send him a short, YouTube video in direct reply and he sends me “mmmm” and then I replied to him saying I can show you when I get home ( from work ) and I can also show you how to add Venmo as a digital card in your Apple wallet
He proceeds to just respond with Mhmmm, as “I buy everything for the house” … which confused me like we don’t split all the utilities down the middle and I’m frequently by toilet paper groceries he likes and more so I was confused by that comment??
And now I’m home from work and I don’t see him here. And I’m pretty sure he’s gonna be pissy with me when he gets home.
Am I the asshole for telling him no?
NTA.
If you give him that cash, you will be hounding him for the venmo for the rest of your relationship. Behavior like this from a 30yo man is worrying.
He doesn’t know how to transfer Venmo to a bank account? I’m 62 and I know how to do it. He’s just making excuses so he can “forget” to pay you back. Tell him “mmmm.” NTA
>Am I the asshole for telling him no?
You showed him how to help himself, with a video, then an offer to show him directly when you got home.
I mean, what more could you have done?
My thoughts are that he wasn’t going to pay you back. That there would be some other excuse with Venmo and the $300. Because him jumping directly to “I buy everything for the house” sure made it seem like he thought you owed him on some level, and the $300 would have evaporated.
NTA