Yesterday, me and my girl were watching movies, when she asked me if she can invite her friend too and if it’s fine with me, i haven’t had such an interaction with her friend before so I said yes to it, during the movie i didn’t had much to say because of the friend being present at the moment, I was really quiet during the movie. My girlfriend calls me out for it after the movie and asked if it was fine with me if she was there. I again told her it was fine but i don’t know how to interact much because I don’t know her friend neither she is my friend. She said she’d like it if i would interact a little bit but it was really hard for me.
A part of it came from her behvaiour too when we were watching the movie, they were into their personal talks, and they unintentionally or intentionally threw some shade at me too for no reason. Her friend made a joke about me being a "pick me" and she lets it slide.
On again asking, I told her I was fine with the friend being there (which i am, but it’s hard for me)
I’d appreciate if you guys will give answer on every detail I have mentioned.
Am i the asshole here?
I know you asked for feedback on every detail here but to put it bluntly, there isn’t a single detail you gave that would make you TA. Completely NTA
Thank you for the answer. I really want to know what do u think about me telling my gf that i was fine with it aftet we were done with the movie.
Well as long as you’re being honest, it’s fine to say that and I do believe you.
But that’s not the whole story, you weren’t fine with how they joked at your expense and made you feel like a 3rd wheel essentially. If you keep that to yourself, you risk having it happen again. That doesn’t make you TA that just makes you a doormat. If you don’t stick up for yourself and your significant other doesn’t, who will?
Thank you, I will try to commuicate about it when she wakes up.
NTA, I think it should be on your gf to introduce her friend to you and to help you join the conversation if she wants you to interact more. It’s very difficult to slip into a discussion between two friends like that without any help.
I would be extremely concerned about moving forward in a relationship with you gf. Someone who cares about you looks out for you, has your back, and sincerely has empathy for your feelings.
How would she feel if she was in your shoes? How would she want you to look out for her? Just sayin’ if you can’t talk with her about this, and she can’t see how you felt – maybe you should consider finding someone who can.
NTA. It’s always a little awkward meeting someone who is close to someone you’re close with. It takes time for everyone to find their footing and get comfortable and a movie is not a “getting to know” someone activity.
NTA
Movies are definitely not the way to have initial interactions with someone. Everyone consumes a movie in their own way. And the very nature of a movie means you need to focus on it vs talking and having exchanges.
Having them over to play games or eat would be better.
NTA her comment was out of line
NTA, but maybe tell her how you feel about the ‘jokes’ because that’s how it starts. Also, your gf could have helped you both make the situation less awkward, something like “hey do you know my bf does this or is into….” just a kick start especially after telling her you are finding it difficult to.
NTA. You were watching a movie, regardless of doing that at home or at the cinema, you should all be quiet, speaking only if necessary and rarely. If you spoke with the girl your gf could interpret that as flirting and i wouldn’t be surprised. Also, you should tell her to stop treating you like a child but further context is needed for me to understand why would she act that way
“they unintentionally or intentionally threw some shade at me too for no reason. Her friend made a joke about me being a “pick me” and she lets it slide.”
How does she expect you to be comfortable with someone you barely know coming to your home and making such comments? Whe didn’t she say something?
I wouldn’t want her friend there again to be honest.
NTA
NTA. For one, movie watching isn’t an activity that requires much talking. For two, being okay with your girlfriend having friends over isn’t the same as you wanting to hang out with her friends. The fact that they were joking at your expense while you were sitting right there is a bit of a red flag
You’re NTA
If she wants you to interact with her friend, she needs to actively try to draw you into a conversation rather than having a personal chat that excluded you.
Poking fun at you also wasn’t a good move to help draw you into their conversation.