Hello! Long time lurker and first time poster. Sorry if this post is a mess!
For some backstory, I(19F) have two brothers, but only one is relevant, let’s call him Nolan(20M). Nolan, for the past two or three years has been with his on and off again girlfriend, Izzy(19F).
I have honestly never really like Izzy, and for the longest time I couldn’t really tell you why. However, I had began to somewhat warm up to her a little during late 2025. I won’t say I liked her, but I didn’t dislike her as much. Then, at the beginning of December, she messaged me saying “don’t tell anyone, but send me Nolan’s location.” So, naturally, I called my brother, warning him before I sent her his location.
About 30 or so minutes later, I get another message from her, asking her to tell her when he got home. Confused, I message Nolan, warning him that she messaged me again and asking what the hell was going on. He only responds with “got her” and didn’t respond for the rest of the evening.
So, I texted my mother, a bit later, my father calls me, informing me that anytime Izzy messages asking for Nolan’s location, to ignore it, because she fucked up and is now trying to hunt him down to apologize. Now I’m more confused. And once Nolan got home, I went to ask him questions, only to overhear that she has cheated on him. With. A. Newly. Married. Man. And even more importantly. This wasn’t the first time!
I have made past girlfriends who did similar things cry after going off on them, and when I offered to do the same, my brother told me no, to “be the bigger person”. So instead I blocked and told Izzy to never message me again.
Well now, Izzy is coming back over, and they’re spending time together again. I didn’t even know until my little brother, Mason(13M), said something to my father. My dad turned to me and told me to be nice, but I only told him that Nolan was asking to be cheated on before storming off to my room.
Now, anytime she’s over, I am less than welcoming. Thankfully, she mostly stays downstairs with Nolan, so I don’t see her. But me and my mom had gotten into an argument when I found out Izzy was at the house one day. When I expressed my dislike and frustration about my brother’s idiocy, my mom told me I needed to keep my mouth shut. I told her in response I would never like Izzy and I would never even be civil with her if I could help it. My mom told me I needed to quit being a bitch and to suck it up, or else I was going to drive a wedge between me and Nolan.
So I just wanna know, is my mom right? ATAH?