I’m in this community group chat of around 30 people. I don’t know everyone, but everyone is at least an acquaintance of mine. I posted hosting a get together at my house and said everyone was welcome.
One of the people that said they were coming has asked me, in the group chat (so everyone can see) if they can invite their friend X, who is not in the group chat
I don’t really know why, even though I said everyone is welcome, I don’t really want this person coming. Partially because I like being in control of who’s coming (seeing as though it’s my house) and when someone invites someone else to another persons private residence, it’s a pet peeve of mine. WIBTA if I just said no and gave no reason?
NTA. i understand that “everyone is welcome” makes it seem like it could be a free for all, but i also think it’s reasonable to assume that “everyone is welcome” in a specific chat means “everyone in this chat is welcome”. it seems like this person understands that because they asked first instead of inviting X without checking in. i would just say, hey i’d like to keep this get together to this specific chat for now, but maybe we can have another hang soon where we can all meet X?
NAH. It’s great that they asked in the group, because then you can clarify in the group and there’s no garbled-messages.
“thanks for checking! Actually I’d like to keep this one to people who are on this group chat (and their significant others and kids, if that’s what you meant) – sorry, I should have been clearer in the first place. I don’t really know X – maybe next time you can organize something and I can get to know them then.”
NTA.
It should be understood and okay to know that you meant that everyone in your particular group was invited to come, not outsiders who aren’t currently in the group.
Say it was meant for the people in the group chat, and that you would like to meet X at another time.
Also a pet peeve of mine. If someone invites me somewhere, I don’t feel it’s my place to want to ask/bring other people (unless told beforehand).
NAH, they asked, and it’s your house your say. Personally I like a more the merrier vibe, it’s a great way to meet new people.
You had better point out that when you said everyone is invited, you meant everyone in the group chat because you personally know everyone in the group chat. Otherwise, you may have a lot of extras being brought…
I’m with you, no one comes into my house without either me or my wifes approval. NTA.
NTA but you’re gonna have problems finding roommates.
It doesn’t sound like they invited the other person to your private residence – they asked permission beforehand so not sure why your pet peeving about that. That being said I am not surprised that they thought it was a pretty loose invite list since you are inviting 30 people at once of who many are just very casual acquaintances.
I agree with others that you should be explicit that this is for group chat members only.
NTA. Your house, your rules – only people you know, safer that way. But you can say that when the friend hosts they can invite said friend. The guest does not invite (or something like that).
I have a friend who always wants to invite strangers. Nope.