This happened like 2 hours ago at time of post so i still feel quite raw, violated and frustrated still.
I (m20s) was in my bedroom and after dinner and then a shower i was feeling quite sleepy and got into bed as for what would hopefully be to fall asleep for the night, granted it was still somewhat early (for me) about 9:30-10pm.
Due to past history ( which is too long to drive into fully likely anxiety based) i find it hard to fall asleep i am either 2 extremes: i can fall asleep in 10 minutes or it be 4 hours of trying so when i get sleepy i go to bed near instantly sometimes the ritual of shutting computer down, turning off lights, brushing teeth etc is enough to wake me up enough not to be sleepy anymore.
I was woken up due to the bedroom door as its extremely creaky around 1:30 am it was my mother she then proceed to walk into my room and turns my computer off which is extremely close to my bed ( less then a foot/ with arms reach) and then walks out. The most reasonable she would even come into my room at that time that i can think of is either i snored as she was in the bathroom as it is a very thin wall and then walked in and turn everything off.
The reason i know for sure it was her because she has done the same thing in the past multiple times and told me off for going to sleep with my light/computer on the basis of saving on bills . I normally give a neutral response as if i point out all the hypocrisy when it comes to saving money on bills as she turn on lights unnecessarily out of habit or my dad leave the xbox on and she doesn’t turn it off or how leaving lights+computer on for roughly 8 hours at off peak times is nothing comparing to my dad’s insistence of having the heating in winter on which is FAR more costly.
What makes this situation so frustrating is that i ask near nothing of them (parents) except do not come into my room while i\`m asleep as once woken up i find it incredibly hard to fall back asleep as i feel like i have to be on guard, alert and have my defences up just in case it happens again.
While i don’t like my light being turned off i can understand and it is right next to the doorway so the chances of it waking me up is minimum but i do not understand seeing me in bed asleep then seeing my computer on and think
" i should get within arms reach of a sleeping person and turn off their computer because it will save X money even though it is likely to wake them up"
From experience i can confidently say my mother is the type of person who only learns when it happens to her and it is incredibly hard to talk her into changing her opinion as the more you try the more defence and dug it she gets the only thing i can do is talk to her when she wakes up likely angrily and swear (which is extremely rare for me so it would show how strongly i feel on this) and say how violating it is to be sound asleep only to hear and then have a random person inches away from you messing with your belongings
edit: made a error in the judgement bot reply: it should read ".. unless it is a emergence and to stop turning off my computer"
Um either move out or start turning your shit off. Not hard. Act like a responsible adult.
Yes, you would. Turn your stuff off. It’s a waste of money and not great for the environment.
Also, is it your parents house? If so, be respectful of that. If you really can’t help it, maybe make a rule of turning everything off at say 7pm so when you do get tired it’s not an issue.
Also, do you pay the electric bills?
You are living at home, in your mid twenties?
Turn the damn electronics off before you go to sleep, and stop being such a whining embarrassment.
Exactly. He’s also whining saying that he keeps it on but complains about not shutting lights off. A PC runs exponentially more energy that lightbulbs. Also uses turning the heat on as an example of high energy use. Sure, do you want to freeze,OP? Most people turn on the heat during the winter. It’s not your house, and you’re likely not paying for electricity. Rates for electric delivery are absurdly high right now. YTA OP
yta. put some wd-40 on your door hinges and stop wasting power by leaving your stuff on while nobody’s using it… ESPECIALLY considering you don’t pay the damn power bill.
turn it off yourself and nobody will have to come do it for you.
Info: How much did you agree to pay her for running these things all night and when was your last payment?
Because it sounds like this was not part of your rental agreement. You can argue all you want about your dad leaving XYZ on, but the difference is (I’m assuming) he is paying out of his own hard earned money to leave XYZ on.
You don’t ask much of them except shelter, heat, electricity, Internet, what else? And before you come at me with I pay them or I do this and that for the them, it really doesn’t make too much difference.
Because, how dare you be in someone else’s house and “explode” on them for anything? You can pack up all that computer stuff, grab your pillow and blanket, and take it to your own home with your own bills, where you can leave the light and computer on in perpetuity.
YWBTA, Don’t let the bed bugs bite.
YTA — it’s essentially your parents house and rules you need to respect it. I don’t know if you pay any bills though.
YWBTA if you exploded at your mom. Her wanting you to turn your computer off is a reasonable request. it just takes a few seconds. Next time you get sleepy just turn it all off before you do.
Maybe you can change your computer setting to turn off if there is no activity after an hour. Then you can let your mom know you set it to shut down after a period of time so she doesn’t need to turn it off. That could be a good backup plan.
YTA Don’t explode at your mom for turning off your electronics, turn off your electronics before going to bed and stop wasting electricity. And I’m assuming she does what she wants with the electric because her and your dad pay the bills.
YTA – Instead, go with, “my bad mom, thanks for turning it off”
Why not just turn on the setting that allows your computer to turn itself to sleep mode or whatever after x time of inactivity?
Yes, you’d bta for exploding on her for this.
To me, there’s a difference between a sleep-deprived person losing their temper in the heat of the moment when they’re woken up, and pre-meditating an explosion on a date TBD. Especially when there are other options for you, but no other options for your mother if she doesn’t want to waste electricity. Set your computer to turn off after x minutes of inactivity. Get a lamp close to your bed so you don’t have to get out of bed to turn them off. Brush your teeth before leaving the bathroom after the shower. Come on. YTA
YTA. Turn it off BEFORE you get in bed, and this won’t be an issue. Solved.
ESH. Adults deserve privacy even if they’re living at home, but not shutting down your computer at night when you know it’s important to them makes you an AH, too.