So my son plays hockey, the kids are the team are 7. We don’t have a goalie like all the other teams so the kids take turns being in net.
The coach started a list and has been asking the kids if they want to play goalie next week. Sometimes the kid says no and he moves onto the next person, sometimes someone says they are away and so on.
My son and some of the other kids are going on their third time being in net while some kids haven’t. We have a group chat and I said
“Hey everyone, is there anyone who hasn’t had a turn being goalie yet, or has only been goalie once? Would be nice to try and really split the goalie rotation. Some kids are going on there third time being in net and just want to make sure its fair for all the kids.”
A couple parents responded saying that their kid will play goalie for the next game.
The coach responded eventually saying he has just been going through the roster not wanting to pressure any of the kids who said no. Everyone has been liking his post.
I am just trying to be equal here, if my son didn’t want to play net I would really try to encourage him, I would talk to him privately and tell him he has to play because that’s what good team mates doc it’s fair and everyone needs to take a turn.
AITA?!
YTA. Ultimately this comes down to “let the coach coach”. If you want to push your kid go ahead but don’t get in between what the coach is doing and how the other parents want to treat their kids. Everyone’s kid and situation is different. Just worry about your kid.
Also to add, I did private message the coach just apologizing if my message came across as me questioning how it’s been done, just told him I’m sorry and that I just thought all kids could take a turn. I also thanked him for the time he puts in for our kids and how much I appreciate it.
Private messaging doesn’t make it better.
You are overstepping. Have you considered that some 7 yo don’t have the coordination or skill yet to play goalie? It’s not your role to pressure others or meddle in coaches decisions.
YTA. Stay in your lane. If you think the coach should try a different approach, speak to him directly and let him decide how to handle it.
YTAH – why don’t you want to teach your kid that it’s okay to have and express an opinion if he wants to play goalie or not?
You’re not the coach. YTA.
YTA – you don’t need to micromanage this. Your son is also free to say no when his name comes up on the list. If at a certain point, no one agrees to be goalie, than the coach can institute a different process: ie. everyone has to take a turn. Just let this play out.
YTA. He’s asking and they’re saying no. Have your kid say no if they don’t want to but pressuring other kids is an AH move and showing them that saying no doesn’t matter to them.
YTA The coach already has a fair system in place. If you don’t think other kids are “pulling their weight” well, suck it up, they are 7.
YTA. The coach has already done his due diligence and asked the kids. I get you wanna be fair, but as you said, some kids don’t want to, and then some are away. So by that alone, it would say that yes multiple kids have played goalie more then a few times. So your hypothetical problem is that if your kid said he didn’t want to do something you’d try to convince him otherwise? It sounds like you’re making your issue everyone’s issue. I think you need to take a step back and just let things be. If your kid comes to you and has an issue then bring it up again to the coach yourself, not in a group chat. Otherwise, back off a bit bud.
Gentle YTA. Goalie is specialized position, and is much different than asking a player to play defense, forward, or center. In our association, we offer the chance for everyone to try goalie at the younger levels, but do not pressure or require everyone to take a turn in net. Goalie is such a crucial position that putting a player in net who has no desire to even try is likely going to result in less than ideal outcome for the team.
If your child is no longer interested in taking a turn in net, you are also free to decline the next time the coach asks.
yta
No one is being forced to do anything. Seems like a fair system as long as they are getting volunteers, I don’t see the problem
YTA.
If your kid doesn’t want to play net again and all he has to do is say no thanks, he should just do that.
I coached hockey, when my kids learned to skate and played cross ice we rotated goalies. But we never forced a kid who didn’t want to do it. I understand that you would encourage your kid if they didn’t want to bu there’s a difference between forcing and encouraging. YTA