I am currently in college and living in the dorms with a roommate. I type consistently less than 50dB, which is actually considered within range for a quiet keyboard, but for the last few days, my roommate has been continuously hounding me over my keyboard volume, claiming that he can hear it through his noise cancelling headphones.
I’ve obviously tried to type quieter, but that comes at the heavy expense of my typing speed. Nobody else has ever had a problem with my typing volume before this. I talked to my friends who advised me that it was doing no good to continue to argue about this and to stop discussing it. I told my roommate that I was done discussing this issue and pointed out that my typing volume is in fact well within a normal volume, so it’s not like I’m typing abnormally or outrageously loud. My roommate didn’t take it well and got angry with me for telling him I was done discussing it.
ESH
You are likely correct that typing under 50 dB falls within a normal range. From an objective standpoint, you are not engaging in extreme behavior. Dorm living, however, is not governed only by technical thresholds. It is governed by shared tolerance.
Your roommate may be unusually sensitive to sound. That does not automatically make his concern invalid, even if others have not complained. At the same time, expecting you to significantly impair your productivity to accommodate ordinary keyboard noise is unreasonable.
Where you contributed to the conflict is in shutting down discussion rather than moving it toward resolution. Saying you are done discussing it signals dismissal. In shared housing, negotiation is usually required. His reaction, however, was also disproportionate. Getting angry instead of problem solving escalates rather than resolves.
A more constructive approach would focus on mitigation rather than debate. For example, setting agreed quiet hours, repositioning desks, adding a desk mat to dampen sound, or exploring a quieter keyboard. That shifts the conversation from who is right to what works.
You are not wrong to expect tolerance for normal activity. He is not wrong to express discomfort. The failure was in moving from disagreement to solution.
why should OP continue to “discuss” it with someone who clearly wouldn’t be happy unless he got it 100% his way? OP was more than comfortable trying to accommodate but the roommate was being unreasonable, if the roommate escalates the issue every single time & refuses to compromise, i don’t see a valid reason to not shut down further conversations about it.
there’s no way he can hear that through noise cancelling headphones he’s lying
He has continuously emphasized his Sony XM6 headphones and how he’s been blasting his headphones all the time, but still hears me. When I heard this at first, I was very skeptical considering my Bose QCs fully block out my typing if I try to listen for it.
You don’t say what time of day you are typing? If you are typing at night while they are trying to sleep, yta
Mostly morning to afternoon. I reduce my typing and type slower when he’s sleeping.
NTA. This is an issue the roommate has to address on his own. Circumstantially, if you’re typing rapidly and continuously at times most people expect to be resting/sleeping, there might be a conversation there, but if you’re in “normal” hours and doing normal computer activities, it’s on your roommate to figure out a way to block it out. Noise cancelling, white noise, earplugs…. he can do whatever he wants with his own ears.
IIRC, 50dB is right in range for an office environment. It’s acceptable levels for most areas of a busy library and it’s not actually as loud as a city street or similar. It’s probably too much during quiet hours, but as long as you’re not talking about typing hard and fast at 3am, this should be something you can just let your roommate fume about.
To be clear though, OP, because I cannot help but make trouble in my answers some times, my keyboard is mechanical and I type at a decent rate and I’m not exceeding 35dB. I’ve got a meter next to my laptop and it’s only going really hard and fast that I can get over 25dB. Are you actually, alone, hitting 50dB with your typing alone? That’s insane and I’m surprised your keyboard still works.
IF, and this is an IF, applicable only if your roomie won’t let it go or you ARE typing frantically at 3am with the world’s heaviest fingers, you can offer to split the cost of a whisper quiet keyboard with him. Silicone ones are generally less noisy, I think, but I do not like the feel of them at all.
NTA. He is living in a dorm. Listening to someone type on a keyboard is expected. He is fortunate that is the extent of what he is hearing.
Is this a manual typewriter?
That would be hilarious. But I suspect our dear writer has just come up against his first case of roommates are the worst
NTA
“Since I’m not intentionally typing loudly, I think the only solution is for you to buy a quiet keyboard for me to use when I’m in the room.”
Keyboards aren’t that expensive, so he can buy a quiet one for you or it’s not worth that much to him.
If you’re typing in the mornings and afternoons, a perfectly reasonable time to be working on your computer, then why is he sleeping?! Does he work graveyard shifts? When does he expect you to do your homework if morning and afternoon are unacceptable? Maybe those are things worth telling him, or pointing out that if he gets on a normal schedule, nobody will be typing while he’s trying to sleep. Also, he has to be lying about the noise canceling headphones because those things block out traffic noise, and a PSA was issued not to wear them while walking on the street because you couldn’t hear danger. They’re either not noise canceling or he just doesn’t like wearing them, but there’s no way he can hear you typing if people with normal hearing can’t hear car horns through them.
But you are done discussing it.. There’s nothing left to discuss.. not aita.