So I 24(M) live in a 4 bedroom apartment with other roommates. My roommate 25(M) and I have been good friends for a while and never had any tensions. This afternoon, I was washing up some of my plates and bowls in the kitchen and noticed that the drying rack has been full for a good portion of a week, with the same stuff.
I texted him saying something along the lines of “Hiii are the things on the side yours?” and sent him a photo when he asked. He replied saying “Some. I’ll deal with it when I get back”. I said that that was fine and joked that I’d been stacking stuff on top of them with a laughing emoji. He snapped back at me saying that “I’M physically unable to do it rn” and “It sounded like you were getting annoyed at me for not being able to”. Here I may have been the AH because I said “Did I say do it right now? I was just asking and joking”. He replied with “K”.
So am I the AH for thinking he’s being childish when all I did was ask if they were his?
NTA, you were just asking a question and joking around, he’s overreacting for no reason
It sounds like you live with other people?
I’m hoping the answer is yes. If not, YTA.
If you recognized his dishes, and he let them sit there for a week. Then he’s is the asshole and you are not NTA.
He is just pissed you are calling him out. He thinks his time and space is more important than yours. Fuck him. He sucks.
Hi, yes we do live with 2 others
Sounds like he’s overreacting asking about dishes isn’t a personal attack.
Why did you text one roommate not everyone if you needed them to move dishes?
Because I thought I recognised a few, the ones which were there the longest, as his but I wasn’t sure and didn’t want to potentially embarrass him on the rommate groupchat.
It makes the most sense to not call anyone out and just mention the rack is full and everyone needs to be mindful of putting away dishes, especially when one person isn’t around so your text doesn’t help you in the moment
I did want to do that but I was afraid it might sound passive aggressive since most were his
Nothing about your texts sounded harsh to me. NTA. He overreacted. But maybe he was having a difficult day so don’t stay mad.
NTA. You were just asking a question. Try to shrug it off. You mentioned getting along well and there not usually being tension. Maybe he’s having a tough time and feels guilty about it, so he got defensive and snapped. Not okay but I’d try and let it slide if it’s not a frequent thing.
Why didn’t you just put them away instead of putting more wet things on top? I’m guessing you’re an asshole and that’s what your housemate is reacting to. The dishes were just another example of you being you.
NTA. He didn’t bother doing it and he’s embarrassed.
INFO If roommate is physically unable to put his washed and dried dishes away, did he suffer some serious injury after he was physically able to wash them and put them in the drying rack?