I (24F) needed an sd card for my camera before Monday. I couldn’t drive to get it myself, but only my stepdad has a car at the moment, and I need to get cleared by my neurologist to drive. I told her a few days ago that I needed it before Monday so I can do my project for the photography class. We had some issues with the order to pick up, so I wasn’t able to get it until the last minute. Today, I asked my mother if Best Buy had the card ready for me in-store. She said “yeah, why?” I told her that I’ll need it before tomorrow morning.
At first she was confused (and I was too). I explained to her that I needed it for homework, and not for an in-class assignment. She then realized how urgent it was, and she apologized for it. I told her “No worries. I should’ve been more specific. You didn’t know.” I wanted to get it before the snowstorm, but like I said before, we had some issues with the order.
But in the back of my mind, I had a feeling that my stepdad will be upset about this (we don’t have a good relationship with each other).
I ended up hearing her and my stepdad argue about it because he didn’t want his car to get messed up in the snow, but she said she’ll find another way then (like maybe a bus or uber). After a couple of hours, my stepdad expressed to her that I was emotionally manipulating her by having her go out with the result of the snowstorm from last night.
I felt pretty bad about it afterwards, and I could’ve probably just taken an Uber or something like that instead. I also feel like I should’ve communicated better. I believe it was more of a communication issue, but my stepdad thinks I’m manipulating her. My mom told me that it wasn’t entirely my fault, and it wasn’t too big of a deal.
AITA or was this a misunderstanding?
NTA, as a parent of a kid who can’t drive for medical reasons, sometimes it slips my mind that they need to go somewhere or something needs to be done.
Maybe communication could have been better, maybe you could have reminded her earlier but shit happens.
Yeah. I think it’s normal to have these misunderstandings, and sometimes things happen that is out of your control. Glad you understand the situation. 🙂
NTA
Sounds like your stepdad is committed to misunderstanding you and assigning you ill intent. It was just a lack of communication and not great circumstances. No need to feel guilty.
Yeah. Unfortunately it’s hard to not feel like I’m walking on eggshells, but I try to not take it too personally. There may be a reason why he felt so strongly, and has little to do with me.
INFO:
1) Are you getting hit by the winter storm that has been forecast for the last week or so?
2) Why couldn’t you order online and have it delivered last week?
1. Yes.
2. I needed to get my SD card ASAP for the assignment, and it was best to get it picked up within an hour. I did have it ordered last week, but we had an issue with the order. This was before the snowstorm occurred.
INFO: When did your mom go out? Where do you live? Cause if you live in the Northeast nobody should get out driving for anything other than an emergency (this isn’t an emergency). Ordering an Uber doesn’t make things better.
She got out today, and yes I live in the northeast area. I’m not sure how she was able to go, but she said she was fine and didn’t feel uncomfortable.
But the snowstorm wasn’t last night. It’s today.
You stated, in a comment, that you’re getting hit by the storm that’s hammering a big chunk of the US.
You’ve known that this storm was coming for at least a week.
Everyone I know made extra effort last week to “get \[X\] done before the storm hits” or “reschedule \[Y\] because of the weather forecast”.
You should have been one of those people.
You shouldn’t be asking people to go out in a winter storm.
YTA.
I respect that.
I would think a 24 year old would have better communication skills. soft yta
You are correct.