For some context, a few months ago my friend and I bought tickets for a concert. We paid with her dad’s money and agreed that I would pay her back my part which was £100. A couple days ago I gave her the money so that she could pass it onto her dad, and I would’ve paid back my part. However, her dad said that she could keep it and that he didn’t need it (they’re well off). When she told me this I asked her how she wanted to split the money then, given that her dad didn’t want it. She asked me what made me think that we would be splitting it and told me that she would obviously keep all of it. I got angry at this but kept my cool through text, explaining that the money technically belongs to me given the fact that she didn’t pay for anything with her own money. Now she’s ignoring my texts and I’m pissed. I am not in a good financial situation so being able to get some of that money back would help me massively.
Before making any decisions while I’m emotional, I want to check if I’m being selfish for wanting some of the money back, I don’t mind splitting it as I’m still grateful that she bought the tickets for us when I wasn’t able to to pay for them. However, I understand that I may be being selfish as technically her dad gave the money back to her? So, AITA for wanting to split the money?
EDIT: I just want to make it clear that my friend is still texting me, the money conversation is just on hold. Also, she is not using me for my money otherwise she wouldn’t have given me as much time to pay or even asked for her dad to pay for my ticket too. We are friends and this is not a big deal, I’m just looking for advice on how to handle this situation.
Yes, think of it like her dad just gave her $100, you would not expect her to split it with you.
YTA if you keep pushing this. There are two transactions here. 1 you paid for your ticket. 2. Her dad gave her 100 euros. Her dad can give her money whenever it pleases him and you are not entitled to any of it. The proximity of these transactions makes it feel like it’s something that it’s not.
YTA. Money her dad decides to give her or let her keep is hers. You decided to spend money on a concert and if you’re in that bad of a financial situation, don’t spend 100 on a concert. That’s 100 her dad wouldn’t have to give her in the future in his mind. You were fine reaping the benefits of a friend that could use her dad’s money to buy your ticket up front to secure your seat and pay it back later. Don’t expect that in the future if you plan on pushing for a free ticket.
You’re the reason why I stopped paying for my girl fiends. People become entitled and don’t appreciate anything.
Her dad wanted to gift her those $100 bucks. It doesn’t belong to you. YTA
YTA, money exchanged between her and her dad is not your business. There’s not really a difference between her money and her dad’s money, so you paid with her money and you paid her back her money. Whatever else happened to it is her business.
YTA
her father said SHE should keep it. he gave HER his money. it’s his choice. this has nothing to do with you. why would he pay for your ticket?
there is no way this money would technically belong to you. her father obviously fonances his daughter and obviously it would make no sense to him to collect this cash from her and next week send her more money.
YTA
Sounds like her dad gave her £100.
Did he say “you can keep it” or “the tickets are on me”? Big difference.
YTA. Technically you’re wrong. Very wrong, in fact.
The money stopped having anything to do with you once you paid her dad. It then being his money, he decided to give it to his daughter, your friend. Now it’s hers. You are not entitled to it and frankly, I don’t understand your anger. She got the tix, you got your concert, you paid her dad, her dad got your money. It’s done. Would it be cool if she decided to split it with you or pay for an outing for you both? Of course it would have been but she’s not obligated to do so.
She sounds nice and like she’s been generous or accommodating as a friend. I’d hate to see you mess this up being angry and being wrong. Good luck.
YTA, you gave the money you owed. It’s no longer yours. The person who was owed the money gave it to someone else. Still not your money.
Friends father bought her a ticket AND gave her money that was owed to him. How exactly are you entitled to a share of it?
YTA
You paid the dad 100 dollars
Dad gave his kid the 100 dollars
That is what happened. Dad gave his money to his kid…
YTA you agreed to pay for the ticket. You are not entitled to a discounted ticket/a partial refund because the recipient transferred the funds to someone else.
YTA
You owed a debt, which you paid. What the person you owe does with the money is in no way connected to you and you aren’t entitled to it anymore. If you can’t afford to spend the money, you shouldn’t have agreed to take on the debt. That’s anak not your friend’s problem.
That your friend’s dad gives her gifts doesn’t change that.
YTA he gave her the money. Not you. You owed him the money and he told her to keep it. Doesn’t mean you get anything
YTA first of all, if money is so tight for you to need that money back, then you shouldn’t have bought the ticket. But more importantly, it’s not your money. You ordered a ticket and paid for it. How your friend and her dad handle their finances isn’t your business. Her dad might not like carrying cash. Her dad might be just figuring that if he let her keep that 100 it’s 100 less he’ll need to give her next week, or he was going to give her 100 for the concert food and merch and that’s it, etc. You owed him the money and paid him. He chose to give that money to his daughter, that’s a separate transaction. The fact that the cash technically physically stayed with your friend thru all of that is irrelevant.