Long story short, my ldr girlfriend spends a huge amount of time playing with her friends, now don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to separate her at all from her friends, if she has friends, that’s okay. If she wants to play with them, I cannot do anything about that, she’s spending time with them. I simply can’t have her all to myself. Though, a lot of the time she barely plays videogames with me or talks with me on weekends, know that it’s practically our only way of getting to spend time as she is in a different time zone than me and her work goes past my bedtime. Sometimes I try to get to plan with her but a lot of the time it goes awry, and we either don’t play the weekend or barely do. I just really miss a lot of our time spent together and her deciding to play hours with her friends feels significantly more than the time with me. I just wanna know if I am alone I’m this.
Your situation is quite difficult given timezones, the LDR itself. You don’t provide too much backstory on if this has been happening since the beginning of your relationship or a recent development – you may be better off in the LDR sub reddit
Appreciate the advice, I’ll go there. I did forget to include the details is that this has not been happening since our relationship started, rather for 9 months since I noticed.
Sorry bud, but it seems like you might be more interested in her than she is in you.
If you can only play video games with her on weekends, and that’s practically your only way of spending time, I would seriously question that relationship. It doesn’t even sound like a relationship mate.
Why don’t you plan to visit her in person?
Did you meet online? INFO.
I have a serious financial situation with my college tuition, meaning I can’t just fly over to her. Yes, we met online, we occasionally voice chat or video chat.
Cut your losses. If this makes you insecure now & she’s not making a composed effort to address your needs it’ll only go down from here.
LDR absolutely needs a transition from remote to in person, if you aren’t fiscally able, date locally.
The label of girlfriend is meaningless and irrelevant online if there isn’t any substantial commitment from both parties.
For the record long distance relationships never work out in the long run. It works if you have lived together and the distance is temporary.
That certainly is a pearl of wisdom right there, mr. I eat femboyz looooool!!!
NTA, I think these are definitely human feelings ! We all have moments where we want to be centred more by our loved ones. And that fair ! And with you not wanting her to separate from her friends shows that you understand her personhood. I definitely think (personally) that you could honestly just have a conversation about it, and maybe even ask if you could be introduced to the friend group and start to hangout with them including her ! 🙂 you’d score more time and more friends ! But definitely don’t be hard on yourself for wanting to have more time with her, you’re valid.
Thanks for the comment, about asking to be friends with her friends, it doesn’t seem like a really bad idea, though I am more of a person to spend time talking with her by ourselves, even if we don’t play and we just talk. Just sharing my personal feeling.
Absolutely ! And hey, that’s your prerogative ! She may just enjoy gaming more in comparison to just chatting all the time which to me gave me the idea of trying to have a conversation about maybe hanging out with her and her friends ! And don’t worry, I understand it’s your personal feelings. We’re all entitled to how we feel, there’s no right or wrong way to feel about your situation. I would further suggest maybe just having a heart to heart with her about how you’re feeling and grow from there !
You’ve admitted that your schedules don’t align. She has time when her friends have time, but you don’t. Don’t be jealous of time she spends with her friends when you couldn’t spend that time with her anyway.
* Now, on the weekends when you’re both free, is she choosing her friends over you?
* What is making things “go awry” that you can’t engage in playing games together?
* Is it because she wants to spend quality time with you instead, talking about meaningful things instead of engaging in silly fun?
These are things that could change my judgment, but for now, with just the information you’ve given us, YWBTA for being jealous for the time your GF spends with her friends.