I (26F) went to a party with a friend (35M). After it ended, he asked if we could host an after-party at my place and promised he would manage everything. I was hesitant but eventually agreed.
I didn’t know any of the other people personally, but everyone seemed nice enough. We partied until around midday the next day.
At some point during the night, six of the girls asked if they could borrow some clothes because their party outfits were short and revealing. I collect oversized anime shirts and had some shorts, so I lent them out. I also lent two guys shirts to wear.
The next day when everyone was leaving, the girls asked if they could leave wearing my clothes because they felt uncomfortable going home in their original outfits. For context, I live in a fairly conservative country, and revealing clothes can attract negative attention or judgment.
I said no. My reasoning was:
I don’t know these people and may never see them again.
The shirts were new, somewhat expensive, and part of a collection I care about.
My friend got upset with me and said I was prioritizing material things over the girls’ comfort and potential safety. He said it could be shameful or risky for them to walk home in their original outfits here.
Now I feel guilty. I did lend them the clothes for the night, but I wasn’t comfortable just giving them away to strangers.
So AITA for refusing to let them keep my clothes?
NTA girls are notorious for taking clothes and not giving them back. I wouldn’t do it either.
Humans*, not just girls. I have had many males take my clothes and not return.
Come to think about it, one dude borrowed my excellent hiking jacket, kept it for a long time, then when i took it back since I had a trip, he asked for it back. Claimed it was his. AND my wife loved wearing it.
Yes I think he’s somewhat slow mentally.
The girls prioritized discomfort and potential safety by CHOOSING THEIR OUTFIT. If there’s a blizzard outside and I go out in a bikini, on me when I freeze to death.
NTA. Your friend pressured you into hosting an after-after party, promising that he would run and take care of things. In my opinion, that also means him giving spare clothing. Not you providing yours.
NTA lol. You lent the clothes, which was already generous.
No, they chose to wear those close out smh. You were nice enough to let them use them there. On the other hand you could have taken something of value for the items so you did get them back.
NTA , they could have planned better. Their safety is their priority first, did they care to carry an extra piece?
NTA
They went out of their houses in these clothes and weren’t bothered by it. So why now, when they want to go home?
But basically: these people are strangers to you. You might never see them again and thus your clothes.
NTA. You’re the bad guy in their eyes, but you still have your collection intact. If you gave away the shirts and tried to get them back later, you would still be the bad guy, but without your clothes.
Nta my friend gave a girl a sweater she dwore she’d bring it back. Never did
The friend that asked about the party and said it would be their responsibility should have offered rides or walks home if safety is such a concern. Did the girls not walk there
Don’t know what country you’re in but was there anything preventing a person (like that dude who said he’d take care of everything). From running to a store during the day and grabbing some track pants and hoodies for the girls who needed?
NTA
Their lack of planning is not your problem. I collect comic book t-shirts and I know how expensive they are and hard to replace. Plus it sounds like it would have been a bunch of t-shirts to replace.
NTA, they can do their walk of shame , they aren’t your friends and if they were worried about being seen in the clothes they should have gone home and not come to an after party