I (20f) and my bf (30m) have had to switch to long distance… for contexts we have been together 8 months and I am 5 months pregnant. (Not ideal but we made it work) he has had to go home for two months.. he will be back sometime late February and I am due mid March. Now flash forward he has been gone about a week… communication has never been his strong suit but it was easier in person when I could watch his body language and facial expressions. In the week he has been gone we have had 1 call longer than 5 minutes and it was when he was drinking with his cousin and she talked to me more than him. My dad is in the hospital with and estimated month left. I don’t really have anyone other than him and he knows this.. every time I said long messages about my feelings I get a few words back normal “I hope you feel better soon” and then that’s the end of it. I can feel myself emotionally pulling away from him. It feels so exhausting to be so attached to someone who seems to not care.. and I just being dramatic
? Would just like to add he had no choice to go home as he was in the USA on a work visa.. he already has the contract do next year it just doesn’t start till February
Are you entirely sure he wants anything to do with being a father? Because it sorta sounds like he’s just trying to bail.
Up until he left he was super enthusiastic and loving… he would kiss and talk to my stomach take me to all appointments and ask questions to me and the doctors he is like a completely different person
I feel like he had to be putting on an act because obviously going from being attentive to barely talking to your very pregnant girlfriend overnight
Agreed! The bf has had two months away to be alone and think about his future. It seems like he may be having doubts about the relationship.
Honey, you need to start preparing for the fact you’ll be raising this child alone. Please try to build a stronger support system. I’m so sorry.
NTA
He got you pregnant 3 months into the relationship then runs off “home” for two months. doesn’t communicate with you. very dry replies. you have a lot on your plate being 5 months pregnant and your father isnt well.. and he doesn’t seem to have a care in the world. not being dramatic at all, id say you’re under reacting..
I would say there’s a good chance he’s not going to come back. If you haven’t broken up by the time he’s “supposed” to return, the excuses will start. NTA.
Oh dear… it sounds like he’s trying to phase out of your life. You might have to prepare to be a single mom
You got pregnant with someone you’d only known for three months. This may not be a problem of his communication skills. It sounds like he may not feel committed to you or the baby. Frankly I’m not impressed with a 30 year old who plays around with a 20 year old. You aren’t a teenager, but you are probably considerably less experienced than he is. If this turns out well for you and the baby, good. But if he backs off on the relationship, be prepared to make him pay child support. Sorry to be negative, but you’ll be able to handle things better if you are realistic.
NTA. This 30 year old man saw an opportunity to hook up with someone much younger and he took it for his own selfish gratification. Now that there’s consequences hes running. Hell I wouldn’t even be shocked if he was married. Communication “isnt your strong suit” when you can’t talk around your wife.
Poor baby. You’re in for a long road ahead, but you’ve got this. Spend time with your dad, and prepare for your little one. You may have to do it alone.
NTA obviously, but this is quite a mess you’ve gotten yourself into. Really hope it works out.
Unfortunately, there’s a fetus involved. Doesn’t sound like the makings of a great relationship. NAH.