Context : Approximately 92% of my country worships Buddhism, 5% worships Islam, 1% Christianity and the rest is split into other smaller religious groups.
My(20) parents divorced when I was 12, with my mom remarrying when I was 15. Her husband is a Muslim. When I came out as bi, he got very upset. He called it unnatural and disgusting. I told him he has the right to the opinion that I’m disgusting because of my orientation but I also have the right to the opinion that he is disgusting because of his opinion. He got angrier.
He told me I must stop being attracted to people of the same gender. That was when I grabbed my phone and wallet. He asked where I was going and I told him I’d rather see Manchester United win the League than spend another minute in the same room with him.
I haven’t visited my mom in six weeks now. I knew the age of majority in our country is 20 so I timed my coming out this way, having anticipated that I might want to be able to stop visiting if things go badly. She’s been calling and sending me messages, saying I shouldn’t have been so quick to leave and should consider his beliefs. That I was too hot-tempered.
NTA. Your mom is choosing a man who is not even your father over you. Good riddance.
NTA. At all. He called you disgusting, which, as you said, makes him the ah and the disgusting one. I’m very sorry that you’re going through this.
NTA God I hate these kinda Muslims, giving the rest of us a bad name with their backwards mentality. His beliefs are his alone, he has no right to say a word to you.
I do know most Muslims aren’t like that; I only put the part in since Mom used it as justification for his words.
That’s a weak af copout shes giving him, he has no right to criticise you in any form.
NTA. You’re right, he’s wrong.
Try to arrange to see your mom outside of her house, and let her know that you love her but you’re not going to talk about him, reconciling with him, how ‘you treated him’ or anything like that.
NTA. “Mom, you should have some consideration for my belief that people who fall for homophobes aren’t moral people, and stop being attracted to him. Show me an example of how possible it is to shape your life and decide who you’re attracted to in order to appease someone else’s beliefs.”
>He told me I must stop being attracted to people of the same gender
NTA. Lmao oh yea sure, lemme just flip that switch real quick.
Ridiculous. You can’t choose who you’re attracted to! It’s not like you chose to be bi. The only thing disgusting here, is his unwanted opinion.
your mom is the AH for marrying such an awful man .
NTA- As a Muslim, I think he’s stupid. If he’s determined to follow his principles, why not marry into a Muslim household with traditional beliefs?
He can’t come and just impose his beliefs on you. And your mom is wrong too.
You are who you are, and are attracted to who you are attracted to and can not change just because someone tells you to. We all need to love and be loved.
You have the right to your beliefs, as does he. That does not mean you should allow him to disrespect or demean you with his narrow-minded opinions.
Your mother has chosen her spouse over you, her child. As such she should not be surprised you have stepped away from her and her husband.
I am so sorry you are not receiving love and support. Stay strong and safe.
NTA. Sadly, one cannot say the same of your mother or her husband.
I hope you are somewhere safe, hopefully not somewhere things like sexual orientation get ‘punished’.
NTA. As a Muslim… dude’s a bum.
No need to consider his beliefs. If his beliefs would force you to deny who you know yourself to be, there’s absolutely no need to consider anything he thinks is wrong or right. NTA.