I will break this down as succinctly as possible for the folks at home (and abroad).
I (36 nb) have three people I live with. GF (26f). Friend (25nb). Friend’s best friend (24nb). The friend’s bestie is A.
I will focus on what my interactions with A have been personally since I’m mostly worried if what happened wasn’t worth a 30 day eviction.
The following is a very brief breakdown of what’s happened since they moved in with us in October:
• Three weeks in they quit their job due to mental health reasons. The rest of us covered them, saying they could look over the next month.
• Proceeded to date more than job hunt. Had one person in the house overnight without informing anyone. Cried when we told them that was a boundary issue
•I got two kittens, less than a month old. Everyone adored them, even A’s gf.
•They had their out-of-state gf come over and stay several days. As much as we adore her, by day 4 most of us were wondering when she’d be leaving.
November
• Had issues with their vehicle and now, no matter the weather refuses to drive it. Everyone else chips in by offering rides and buying meals.
December
•A’s GF came back, stayed for three days. Everything was discussed a head of time. A and their GF would bring home bags and bags from shopping, several LEGO sets.
•I told A about a fight I had with my GF. They felt like we needed to tell fourth roommate, Friend. For days after, they kept asking when we would be telling Friend. I admitted that I didn’t know because I was trying to process it.
• A takes it upon to tell Friend about it, saying it was causing them a bunch of stress because I was ‘making them lie by omission’. tldr; fight breaks out because the two of them cornered me, A screamed about how my GF is an abusive bully and I’m covering for them.
•Complains they’re the only one doing chores despite gf and I had been recovering from a car accident that totaled my Escape and kept gf in the hospital overnight
January
•A admits they had to turn down an interview because they know they wouldn’t pass the drug test. Despite not being able to afford their cat’s UT food or food for themself, they still got weed.
February
•A got a job! But refuses to drive themself and within a week complains about wanting to quit. ALSO, they also told Friend they couldn’t carpool with my GF because they were too anxious.
March
•Yesterday: We’ve urged Friend to set boundaries with A. When my kitten got into A’s room, A screamed, threw things, and called her abusive names (like, ‘fucker’). When we said it was abusive, A deflected and got upset.
• Friend reminded us A isn’t on the lease. The three of us agreed to kick A out.
TLDR; AITA for insisting we keep it to only 30 days and not friend’s request for 60.
The kitten thing just makes them unhinged, but you basically just had to say that a person staying with you that isn’t paying rent and isn’t on the lease. Remaining people on the lease are sick of the behavior, and all agree to evict. 30 days is reasonable. They’ve had plenty of time to get it together.
NTA
NTA, living with A seems like it’s making your life much more difficult and 30 days is reasonable, esp when the other roommates all agree
NTA
Not on the lease, hasn’t paid rent since the 1st month if I assume right (or maybe not at all?) So souldn’t be an issue at all to lick him out. For anyone looking at it you guys just let him squat because otherwise he’d be homeless… and he overstayed his welcome.
And better get rid of him ASAP. The sooner the better. Especially since he’s been abusive towards some of the animals and weird about your GF? (No you didn’t had to tell your other friend, only you have the right to decide who to tell, and A was shitty about all of it).
He doesn’t want to work, he wants someone to pay his rent and food and smoke weed. The more you enable him the more he will exploit you.
Just worried about his cat… if you can try to convince him to give the cat up and leave it. Than rehome if you can’t keep her.
Depends on the laws where you live. For example where I live only the landlord or authorized property manager can file for eviction, oral and written leases give someone tenants rights, required notice depends on a few different things with varying time-frames from 3-30 days etc. If you don’t know the laws get legal help. As long as you’re following the eviction laws where you live NTA.
You know the kitten doesn’t know what the word fucker means, right? I want to believe you know, but I really don’t think you do. Anyways, I guess NTA for kicking somebody out who’s not paying rent and not on the lease? But I was exhausted reading this
Yes, my cat does not speak English, but the rest of us humans can hear A lose their shit quite clearly. Thanks for the laugh. Hopefully you’ll recover.
>I will break this down as succinctly as possible
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