I (17F) recently went clothes shopping with my mom for an upcoming trip. As we were browsing, my mom pointed out this cute sweater that she’d seen my godmother wear. She said that my sister (23F) had seen my godmother wear the sweater before and thought it was super cute too. The sweater came in two colours: a white one and a dark brown one. I thought the white one would match more of my outfits so i bought it. For some context, my sister and I share a room and most of our clothes, and we rarely argue over clothes and usually just wear whatever and neither of us has a problem, so I expected that she might want to wear the sweater since she already said that she wanted to buy it. When she saw the sweater, she was upset and asked me why I didn’t buy the dark brown one as that was the one she preferred. I obviously didn’t know this, and I told her so, but she got angrier, asking me why I didn’t ask her what colour to buy, and accused me of “never thinking of her even though she always thinks of me”, which is not true because I bought it with the intention that we could share it. My sister often gets mad about things that I feel aren’t super serious, and I told her that I thought that it wasn’t that big of a deal, especially since I bought the sweater with MY money for MYSELF for a trip that I’m going on. She said that I was selfish for not thinking of her and asking her what colour to get. AITA?
NTA. Your sister sounds very entitled. Does she buy clothes with you in mind too?
I’ll give credit where credit is due, she does buy a lot of stuff for me. She recently bought me a Kate Spade bag that cost her €350 for my birthday. She can afford to do this however because she has a stable job, I don’t. I can understand where her frustration comes from, I just think she could have handled it better.
NTA
If she wants the sweater in dark brown she can buy that one, and then you each have the sweater in the colour you prefer. You shouldn’t have to buy clothes that she wants when buying them for yourself, you should be buying clothes that you like and will wear. They’re your clothes. If it happens that she also likes them and you’re happy to share with her then thats a win, but if she wants specific clothes she can buy them herself. Especially considering shes older than you.
You aren’t her personal shopper and wardrobe provider
NTA Tell me, when your sister buys clothes for herself does she always consult you, as well?
NTA, does she ask you about colour preference before she buys her clothes?
NTA your sister is being a bully
NTA
you bought it with your money for yourself for your trip. her opinion shouldn’t matter. if you choose to share it she should be happy with that. but if she contributed no money she has no say and no right to be upset. also why is she so upset with the color you bought being the one she didn’t want is she’s 23??? she’s too old to be upset about that and she should be able to afford her own sweater at 23.
She wanted you to buy HER the sweater, that’s all.
Hahaha oh dear. I do hope shell grow out if that attitude.
NTA of course.
NTA. Your sister is obviously a selfish fool.
This is stupid. Tell your sister to buy her own damn sweater.
Lmao what NTA obviously. She can buy the brown one.
I think while it’s great you are both happy to share clothing, at some point you are going to have to separate your wardrobe, so you both need to come to an understanding that while you are both happy to SHARE, the person who buys the clothing decides the style. Of course, when buying a GIFT, then you buy what they like.
NTA
NTA – at 23, behaving like this, your sister is either terribly insecure or has preconceived notions about your relationship and is making a lot of assumptions in every interaction.
If you value the relationship and want to see it get better, talk it out. Add boundaries – happy to share clothes, but it’s not communal. Be open to her emotions, see how she reacts. And use that to better your judgement. If she can’t chill out and mature up, awesome. If not, add some space in your relationship and protect your mental health.
PS – don’t let your parents but in.