I’ve always struggled with enjoying my own company and doing things on my own so recently I’ve been challenging myself to get out there more and start doing things on my own. So far it’s just been things like going to bars, coffee shops, going on days out to different towns etc. One thing I’ve been thinking about doing is a solo holiday.
My girlfriend and I go on holiday at least once a year, usually it’s jut the once but couple of times it’s been twice. We live in the UK so our holidays have always been different European cities. I was looking this week about doing a trip either in the Summer or the autumn on my own.
I’m looking at 4-5 nights away. I mentioned my plan to my gf and she said she thinks it’s weird that I want to go away on my own when I’m in a relationship.
I pointed out being in a relationship doesn’t mean you have to do everything together. She asked what it would mean for our trips and I said it’ll just mean we have one holiday this year.
She said our trips shouldn’t be reduced just because I decide to go away but I just reminded her we haven’t even got anything planned for this year so it’s not like I’m cancelling already made plans and we usually only do one holiday anyway
She just said I shouldn’t be doing it and that going away on my own isn’t something I should be considering when I’m in a relationship.
AITA for planning a solo trip?
NTA.
While it may be more fun to do things together as a couple, there isn’t anything wrong with vacationing by yourself. If anything, it may be better to do so sometimes at least.
NTA. The more you learn about yourself, the better a friend and/or partner you are. As long as you’re not planning to go on a singles cruise or known party hot spot, I don’t think yopur partner should have any reason to object.
I don’t think you’re an AH for wanting to go on a solo trip. I went to a concert in New Orleans alone and it was honestly one of the BEST trips I’ve ever taken. It’s so freeing not to have to consider anyone else’s wants/needs and just go with your own vibe on occasion.
I also don’t think she’s an AH for feeling the way she does either though, especially since this would take away one of the trips you two would normally go on together. You two should talk this over more and find a way to compromise somehow.
NAH but talk this out with her.
Like I said in the post it’s usually only one trip a year we go on. We’ve been on two trips twice but it’s not the norm.
The post says you go on at least one, usually two so that’s what we have to go off of.
Yes correct, I then state that it;s usually just one.
edit: apologies I noticed the typo. It should say usually one not usually two.
NTA. Everyone, and I mean everyone, should have a solo getaway every year. Doesn’t have to be expensive, but time just with yourself doing whatever the hell YOU want to do is amazing.
NTA. Even in marriages, time apart and the ability to go off by yourself for a short time is necessary.
NAH. You have a right to live your life, she has a right to be confused and hurt, especially since this seems to have come out of nowhere.
Iam married and I need trips on my own and so does my wife. Everyone needs some time alone. Find a new girl and get some peace
NAH — But this piece: “and I said it’ll just mean we have one holiday this year.” doesn’t seem fair to me. If your solo comes at the expense of one of her holidays, then that’s not cool.
I was going to say NTA but reading your responses to others is putting you in AH territory and shows how the conversation with your girlfriend went.
NTA- you can travel solo regardless of your relationship status. Good on you for pushing yourself like that.
NTA but I do think you framed it wrong. If you usually take one holiday anyway, then this trip isn’t changing what you usually do. So instead of saying, “it’ll just mean we have one holiday this year,” which makes it seem like this is taking something away from her, it would have been better to say, “it won’t change anything, we’ll go on a holiday like we usually do.” Go on the trip though. It’s healthy to have some time on her own. And she can take a trip on her own or with friends too.