I (30F)agreed a few weeks ago to help a friend (32F) by watching her dog for a weekend while she attended a family event out of town. I don’t mind dogs, and I work from home, so I figured it wouldn’t be a big deal. We agreed on the dates, and that was that.
A few days before the weekend, another friend invited me to a small gathering on one of the days I was supposed to be dogsitting. It was only for a few hours, and I made arrangements so the dog wouldn’t be left alone for long. I didn’t think it was an issue, but I mentioned it to the dog’s owner just to be transparent.
She got upset and said that when I agreed to watch her dog, she expected me to fully commit and not make other plans at all. I explained that the dog would still be fed, walked, and cared for, and that I wasn’t neglecting him in any way. I even offered to check in more frequently and send updates.
She said I was being unreliable and that she wouldn’t have asked me if she knew I’d be [busy.At](http://busy.At) that point, I told her that if she was uncomfortable, she could find someone else, but she said it was too late and that I was putting her in a bad position.
Now things feel tense between us. I feel like I kept my commitment and communicated honestly, but she thinks I was selfish for not rearranging my entire weekend.
So, AITA?
NTA. I find it hard to believe that your friend never leaves her dog alone when she’s not out of town.
NTA
dogsitting doesnt require 24hr supervision. dog owners have jobs, they leave their dogs for 8hrs while they go to work, come back, and continue care. as someone who dogsat before, i would go in the morning, after class, then after work at night. give them some sunlight, make sure theyre fed and clean, etc., and go sleep in my own bed.
you and her dogs will be fine. sounds like an overbearing owner to me. maybe she shouldnt take a trip!
If the dog-owner were at home that weekend, would she not have left the home for a similar amount of time (a few hours)? Is the dog not left alone at home for a similar number of hours during the workweek?
If the hours you would be gone were consistent with the hours dog-owner would reasonably be gone on any given day, then NTA.
If there’s something meaningfully different about the time you would gone that you are not being transparent to us about, then y t a. (I’m not assuming that you are.)
NTA as long as u make sure everythings taken care of it should be fine lol
NTA
You agreed to care for the dog, not to be attached at the hip 24/7. It’s okay for you to be away for a few hours so long as the dog is fed, walked, let out to go to the bathroom, and kept safe.
If your friend isn’t okay with the level of care you’re providing, then she can make other arrangements.
How long will the dog be alone? If it’s two hours, NTA. If it’s twelve YTA.
Is there a reason the dogs need someone to sit with them 24/7 ? Dogs should normally be ok by themselves for a few hours.
Watching a dog doesn’t mean never leaving the side of the dog for the entire weekend- that’s unreasonable. I think you covered the care of the dog very nicely. I would never do anything again for that friend- I had a friend like this when I was younger- finally was able to see how toxic that relationship and she was.
Nta. She needed to explain this boundary to you while asking you.
We’re you not supposed to go out to check your mail, put the bins out or go to the supermarket?
What’s “a few hours”? And was it specific hours that the dog would need someone there? (For example, my dog needs medication at very specific times, which I make very clear to any dog sitter.)
And what are “the arrangements” you made for the dog not to be alone too long? If it was to have a third party come over to take care of the dog, you would be TA.
INFO: You made “arrangements”, what does that mean? That you wont be out long or is someone coming by to let the dog out? If so is this someone the owner knows? Is the dog staying at your house or the owners?
Unless your friend spends every moment with her dog and never asks anyone else to watch her dog when she has something fun to go to….oh, wait!
It’s okay for her to find someone else to watch her dog for a bit, but not you? No, you are not the jerk.
NTA. When your friend lives her life is she with the dog 24/7? Didn’t think so.
It’s a dog, not a baby.
She’s a person, not a deity.
You’re a person, not a robot.
If she really felt put in a bad position, something big would’ve occurred: she’d’ve not gone to her event or arranged for someone else to dog-sit. Seems like an unpaid favor that she feels bad is being passed on (along with the fact that she’s not actually responsible enough to pay someone to care for her precious pooch.)
NTA