I (18F) was expelled from my high school around two years ago. I’ve been trying my best to behave as much as possible, but my grades and mental health has been declining massively. My principal (41M) has had it out for me for a while now. When I first arrived in high school, I had a lot of panic attacks, since I suffer from mild PTSD. It was a very catholic school, and the Principal wouldn’t have it, and I’ve been punished every second week for the slightest inconveniences.
Flash forward to a year later, in 9th Grade, there were three boys, "Jack" (14M) "Zavier" (14M) and "Carl" (15M) at the time. They were in my class, and for months on end they’ve been purposefully harrassing me to trigger my episodes, and one day, near the start of 2024, I freaked out and spent hours under my desk screaming. "Zavier" and "Jack" was continuously mocking me by pretending to actually be there for me, but kept making fun of me and humiliating me in front of everyone. "Carl" has been spreading horrible rumors around the school because I was lesbian. This really got to my head, and it declined my mental state even to today.
One day, when I was walking home from school, all three boys were there, and harassed me over and over again on the street. I ran, but they kept chasing me. The school told me repeatedly that I shouldn’t call the police, since *they* would handle it. They might have done something, but they wouldn’t tell me anything about the disciplinary actions. So as it kept on going, I became more and more frustrated, and eventually threatened to sue the school. in September 2024, I absolutely freaked out in the middle of class, screaming and cussing in frustration, then, only two days later, I was already expelled.
I pleaded for the school to do something and see my side of the story, but they wouldn’t do anything. I eventually contacted the Principal directly, saying that I would contact the department of education directly, but he ignored me. Eventually, I did send an email to the department, but I never got a reply.
Was I the Asshole in this situation?
It would be better to spend your energy on graduating from your local public school.
Wait..this was around 2 years ago? I hope you have switched to a different school for that time.
Forget the attorney, you need a therapist.
Sounds fishy. Who are those boys’ parents? Could tell you a little more about why the school wanted to keep the matter under wraps. I have a feeling they might be influential.
ESH.
Focus on getting an education and mental health treatment, not suing people.
This is too much to judge from a single post – did your family not support you?
Not necessarily TA, but it’s honestly better that you aren’t in that school anymore. Try to move forward and get better.
You probably need to focus on mental health solutions/tools before you consider a law suit. Because if you think the stress was high then, it will be much worse in a court room.
Private schools usually have standards that they can enforce that aren’t allowed in public schools. Private schools can be more picky because it’s an option to go there and not an entitlement. A lot of private schools, especially religious ones will also have codes of conduct and other standards that they wish to enforce. This is allowed because private schools can dictate their standards and eligibility of admission.
I’ve worked as a social worker in public schools and we have had this issue. A lot of people don’t realize that when they sign their kids up for private school that they also fill out a forms agreeing to adhere to the standards of the school and this often includes behavioral standards. This form is acknowledging that you read the student handbook and will adhere to the codes and conduct of the school. This usually states that they hold the authority to also kick you out.
Unless you get your parents or actual legal involved, they won’t take you seriously. I doubt you could legally see them because they are not public school and you are subject to their standards as a part of your agreement to attend their school.
It doesn’t matter how much you feel justified if you’re having public freak out and cannot control yourself. You can appear as a danger to yourself and other students; and a liability to the school. Also, some of those private schools, lack the special education and the guidance support that public schools have. They don’t have the resources or the desire to deal with mental health issues.
What exactly would you be sueing the principal for?
NTA, but you deserve to move on. It sounds like that school, including the students and the principal, weren’t good to you. As you said, it’s been two years – I imagine it must be hard holding on to this pain for that long.
Catholic schools (or any religious school, I’d imagine-my lived experience is with a Catholic school) get to make their own rules, and this can lead to an exacerbation of the deeply misogynistic and insular, abuse-excusing traits that exist therein. Especially when it comes to mental health, there’s a lot of wiggle room that public institutions don’t have because they are subject to a district and superintendent that must follow certain rules, whereas the diocese governs Catholic schools. Ultimately it’s gross and yes I’m biased bc I experienced a similar witch-hunt, though without being literally chased down.
OP, I’m sorry for what you went through and i see you’re getting some help with this and life is improving-I love that for you. What does your psych say about the possibility of a lawsuit?
NTA. I doubt youre going to get justice or understanding from them. I also went to a Christian school and the staff genuinely behaved as if lgbt and/or athiest students were threats. The school should not have told you to not call the police
Where are you parents or guardian? How were you able to be under your desk for hours screaming without an adult? You need mental health treatment.