Me and my family are eating dinner. We have the counter set up so we can move around the counter in a circle to get the different toppings. My brother (16 years old) is next to me and keeps reaching over and under my arms to get the things for his food. Doing this interrupts me getting my food ready. I tell him that he needs to say excuse me and wait for me to move aside. He rolls his eyes and ignores me. Our mother jumps in to say that I shouldn’t be jumping down his throat and that it isn’t a big deal. My brother smirks and says that if I try telling him what to do he will just do the opposite of what I say to inconvenience me. I tell my mother to stay out of it if she isn’t going to be on my side. Her undermining my boundaries actively creates space for my brother to be a jerk right to my face and feel like he would suffer no consequence.
This stuff happens all the time and I’m really annoyed that she holds differing standards to us.
you are NTA. your mother is enabling this behaviour and this will result in your brother only getting worse, I’m sorry.
NTA, but I understand why your brother is the way he is, and he’s probably going to be here on Reddit someday wondering why women keep kicking him to the curb.
NTA. your brother sounds disrespectful and your mom enables it. keep doing what you need to do for the sake of your mental health and boundaries. don’t let them gaslight you into thinking you’re sensitive, overreacting, or even the bad guy for standing firm on them either.
NTA. Unfortunately your mom is setting you two up for having a bad sibling relationship because she doesn’t want to parent. Best case she’s lazy and a bad mother, worst case she’s playing golden child vs black sheep and she’s a bad mother. I’m sorry it’s happening.
If my little brother was reaching under and over my arms to get at the food, I would “accidently” knock his plate out of his hands.
NTA
Your brother is wrong, and your mother is *more* wrong.
Some parents favor boys no matter what. Sexist snd unfair. Decent boys know it’s unfair. I’ll bet most of the comments here agree. Maybe show them to him so he knows what the rest off the world thinks…. and especially what the women he might want to be with think. News flash, bro. They won’t think much . They’ll be turned off.
Nta.
your mom is favoring your brother and is probably not going to have your side. I would advise grabbing his arm when he tries to go underneath you and telling him no like he’s a five-year-old. If you were more inconvenient than reaching under you, he will likely stop.
You’re NTA, your brother and mother are. She’s training him to be an AH and this will not end well for him in life. ✌🏼
NTA Every time he reaches around you throw your elbow back or step back so you knock him in the chest or stand on his foot. Tell him if be backs off it won’t happen
When your mother gets her food do the Sama thing to her and tell her she said it’s okay