Hi! I, 18F, has a sister and her partner 25F and 23M moving in with me, i have a home with an upstairs, two bedrooms, and the downstairs has one master, a kitchen, and a living room, the upstairs has two bedrooms, a bathroom, and a loft, about the same size as our downstairs. its my fathers house but he recently moved in with his partner so i moved into his bedroom downstairs, and they’re taking upstairs. they have three pets, a 2 year old lab, a hamster, and a cat. I have one dog, a corgi and he’s a bit older, 10 years old, and has little to no energy and is uncomfortable around other animals (insane anxiety issues that messes with his health as he has heart issues) and their dog is also very playful as well as their cat, and i worry that hes going to get hurt. i told my sister that i would prefer she keeps her animals upstairs, for my dogs health, and my father agrees with me, but her partner said it was unfair for them to be confined and not able to roam the whole house, i told them that my dogs health is my priority, (as its also the last years of his life) and it was his home first. as well as i said they practically get the same amount of space split fairly, since my dog will not go upstairs. they are pretty upset with this arrangement as well as the fact that they cant do permanent changes to upstairs, such as painting, etc… since my father wants to sell the house soon. AITA , or is my father the AH, for wanting to set boundaries?
NTA for the house rules. This is your fathers house, and he is the one who gets to decide the rules. If he says their pets have to stay upstairs, they will have to. But a little YTA for calling it your house. It is your fathers house, and now both his daughters are going to live there, you do not have more right to make decisions than your sister.
This sounds less like you have a home and more like your dad has a house that he’s letting you and your sister live in. You probably can’t dictate rules to your sister and her boyfriend. YTA.
They’re going to be spending time in the kitchen and living room and it’s reasonable for them to expect their dog spend time with them there. I’m assuming it will also need access to the ground floor in order to get outside.
Also, stop saying “setting boundaries” to hide “controlling others”.
thank you so much for your opinion i really appreciate it! i misworded when i said it was my house, i only meant that shes been moved out for a while and never lived in this house with us, its been more of the place i grew up then hers! but your comment does have me rethinking the way i worded things. thank you.
I agree that it is unfair not to allow their dog access to the downstairs when they are down there and easy access to the outside.
It is fair to tell her she needs to keep control of her dog and prevent it from bothering OP’s.
Pretty ballsy to move into a home that isn’t yours and demand full access. You’re NTA.
NTA
The BF is sure acting entitled, especially as it appears he’ll be living for free in his GF’s dad’s home.
He should be grateful, not pushing back against your dad’s rules.
NAH!
I would like you to consider something. Have the dogs met? If yes, do they get along? If no, when will they get to meet? Sometimes, introducing a young dog as a playmate for an older dog actually benefits the older dog. I would suggest focusing LESS on keeping the dogs apart and MORE on helping the dogs develop a mutually beneficial relationship! Go for the Win/Win instead of starting out as advisories.
last time we tried the dog attacked him when he tried to run away since their dog is attack trained, and my dog cannot be around other dogs, we’ve tried before and he gets so unsettled and throws up blood… thats why im so worried…