(This is my little sisters story. She wanted outside advice) my sister (14 female) got a pet snake when she was 10. it was a very quick decision,( she saw a girl had one on social media) and after she saw the snake she immediately introduced the idea to my parents. My sister did all the research and within the week her and my dad were driving an hour away to a reptile store. They came home with a one month old albino corn snake. For the first two months my sister was completely obsessed. She held it every second she could, and upgraded its terrarium every week. After that my sister slowly lost interest. she was still very good about taking care of it, She just wouldn’t hold it as often and wasnt enjoying it as much. For some background context, snakes dont have emotions. They are not like dogs or cats, and don’t enjoy or dislike things. The snake was not very affected by the habits of my sister, although she may be getting less exposure to outside things and less used to being around humans. She gets fed once a week. This type of snake also has a life span of 15-20 years, so my sister would have it well into her collage years and a while after. Anyways, my sister still liked the snake, just wasn’t enjoying the work of it. (yes I know it’s really not that much work, but for an eleven year old at the time she was not enjoying it.) now my sister is on the third year of owning her snake. her new friends love it, and have even talked about getting their own snakes too but never have actually done it yet. My sister has just expressed to me that she is no longer enjoying owning her snake and is super conflicted on what to do. On one hand, she doesn’t really like the snake anymore. It’s become a chore for her to take care of, and it rarely ever gets held or taken out of its terarium exept for when it’s fed. She feels that someone else can give the snake more care and love than she can. she is also moving into high school soon, and is maturing a little from that. She has also said she thinks it might be weird that she owns a snake, although I don’t think it is at all. She says kids are her school and boys may judge her and shes done being embarrassed about it even though she knows she has no reason to be. On the other hand, she feels horrible for having to sell it or give it away. she doesn’t want it to end up in a tiny terrarium in a pet store where it will probably die. Our parents have not idea she feels this way and she also worried they would be disappointed. She’s a straight A student athlete who is very kind and very much a people pleaser She almost never disappoints our parents and is terrified of the idea of letting them down. She also doesn’t want people like her friends to think she’s a horrible person for giving up the snake. I’ve told her she could give it to one of her friends who really wants one, and that way she knows its in a good home. What do you think Reddit? Is she an asshole for considering getting rid of the snake?
NTA, her reasons are valid. It’s good she’s concerned about it ending up in a tiny terrarium, because she would be TA if that happened. She should start looking for a loving home for it. There might be a family interested in a free snake and terrarium, with a little kid obsessed with reptiles. Until then she should keep it.
I was in the same boat with a bearded dragon, albeit I was 16 when I got him. But after a while, and graduating highschool, I realized it was too much for me to give my beardie the life he deserved while trying to manage my own. Is it disappointing? Did I feel like I failed? Yes and yes. But I still rehomed him.
But now, years later, I can look on that decision in a new lense. Im proud of myself at the time that I had the maturity to understand I couldnt care for him the way I should have. I made the hard decision despite criticism. I owned my feelings on the situation and took action. I didnt fail, I set my beardie up to succeed.
So no, NTA. There may be people who judge for it, but thats why Im proud of young me. You know your own limits, and making the right choice despite the opinions of others is HUGE. Making a choice based of what others think is how you end up with regrets, and you dont want to live with many of those
Your sister’s NTA but you know what? Now that she’s had the snake for a few years and the novelty has worn off, it’s time to make a decision about what to do. That snake may not be able to express emotion the way other animals do but that doesn’t mean it’s ok to not care about it. That snake didn’t choose your sister she chose it and she needs to remember that. And as for what the other kids at school think of her snake, well who cares? They haven’t taken care of it, they don’t know how big a responsibility snake ownership is. So why should their opinion count? What your sister chooses to do is up to her, but don’t make excuses make decisions.
I’m a big fan of snakes 🐍 in Australia we have a quite few different varieties.
Rehome it to an adult that has experience and can provide a “forever home”.
Do not give it to another teen who will likely want/need to rehome it in a few years.
NTA for being mature enough to want to provide a better opportunity for the snake.
Snakes have emotions, they just don’t feel love for people like you do.
NTA because a 10-14 year old just isn’t in the right state of life to have a pet that can easily surpass 20 years. sounds like rehoming is the right move regardless of how well she took care of it. what about college, moving, apartments etc?