For context my(17F) sister(14F) has been possessive of our brother(5) for a while now, (about two years). On our trips she calls dibs on sharing a bed in where we’re staying. When she’s holding him, she won’t let others hold him even if he’s reaching for them and when he’s upset she has to be the one to fix it. Lately, our brother has been sleeping in our room several nights a week and has been in her bed. I’m fine with him sleeping over every so often but not as often as this. This situation in particular our brother came into our room while we were watching a movie. I told my sister since he was in her bed and she said not to bother. I ended up bringing him back to his bed and she got mad. I said he wasn’t her property and she said that her bed was. I found out the next morning that they were actually supposed to have a sleepover because my sister offered since our other siblings wouldn’t let him have a sleepover with them. AITA?
NTA as such, but I don’t think this is your job to police this, what are his parents doing about it?
Nothing. All my mom said when I told her about that night is that I sounded like my dad. I said that he should be in his own room since he’s five.
Have you talked to your dad about it?
No. My sister is his favorite child and I don’t think he’d take my side. Or he would shrug it off.
The kid is 5? So he knows how to use his voice, and go back to his own bed if he wants to?
Then leave it alone. It’s not hurting anyone? Then why are you upset about it? Why does it matter??
He was asleep when I brought him to his own bed. I just wanted to know if I was the A for what I said.
What do you mean by sleep over does he not live with you?
He does, I mean sleep over as in he’s sleeping over in our room instead of his room.
NTA IT sounds more like she might not be getting the attention she wants from others and not has gotten a sibling to get that from even if that not healthy at all. Your parents need to be brought into this and understand that what is happening isn’t good. Also just how many siblings do you have because it sounds like you have to act as a parent more than they are. That’s not healthy for you nor anyone else. The fact your parents aren’t stepping in is concerning especially for the wellbeing of your little brother. His needs need to be met as well but also take time to stop and think about all of this before moving forward.
I have five siblings. I try not to take on a parental role anymore but sometimes that doesn’t work out it seems.
That is what i figured. Hun i know it’s difficult because it seems like maybe your parents aren’t exactly present but that is not on you to do at all. I know you want to fix things but again that’s not on your shoulders. It sounds like your sis needs help but again that’s not on you to do unfortunately. I can’t exactly give you advice because i don’t know your full situation but you need to start thinking outside your family and about yourself. You’re about to be an adult and moving forward into life. That’s big and needs your focus now. You come first before everything else that seems to be weighing you down.
Doesn’t sound like a healthy relationship your sister has with your brother. Your little brother may need time away from your sister as well. Does she smoother him? Since your parents don’t seem to be concerned, you should probably keep an eye on things to make sure your brother is growing up without sister coddling him too much. nta