I work in food service and lately we have been so backed up with prep, putting the product out and all the cleaning that comes with running a kitchen. I work nights so am basically the cleaner along with one other person, if they themselves are not backed up with prep.
Almost every night we have been so behind and have wished more help would be sent our way either by other departments being sent in to help, the morning crew putting in a little more effort, or even just hiring more personnel.
For Saturday, I was lucky enough to not have a closing shift and really wanted to take advantage of getting off early enough to go home and have dinner with my family and still tuck my young child into bed. But my manager asked me if I could work 8 hours tomorrow when I was originally scheduled for 6. She asked and I said no. I felt the tension in the air when she snarkily replied, "No?" My coworker and friend even said, "Why don’t you want to work 8 hours?"
I am allowed to have a life outside of work and the fact that my manager asked not even within 24 hours notice is unreasonable. I think I already know the answer and maybe am just seeking validation, but AITA in this situation?
NTA
However I find it’s much more helpful to be like “oh I’m sorry I can’t, I already made plans based on what I was scheduled!”. Helps kinda smooth things over socially and make you see more agreeable to management
They don’t need to know that my plans are drinking cocktails in my underwear on the couch with my cats
NTA, your place of employment has set shift hours and you don’t have to think about the job beyond that. You’re allowed to want to do things outside of that job based on what your schedule is, and should not feel obligated to work because managers/coworkers are.
NTA. Work the hours you were assigned, work them well, and then go home to your family. If you make a choice not to take more, then so be it. That there isn’t enough staff to accomplish the job isn’t your responsibility but the owners.
NTA for exactly this reason. This is not your problem and you don’t need to have any other reason aside from ‘No’. You are allowed to have a life outside of scheduled hours for a job without needing to state why. Maybe your coworkers want or feel the need to put in hours for their own reasons just as you have your own valid and different reasons for wanting to work your scheduled hours. I worked my ass off for jobs like this as a people pleaser only to feel exhausted, pissed, drained, and lifeless.
Another toxic byproduct of this culture when others put in extra hours expecting the same of their coworkers without considering they may NOT want to; this happened at one job so frequently that they never felt the need to even bother hiring other people to cover these open shifts. Apparently it was this ‘unspoken’ thing where you just did it if you were asked. I got the whole ‘But it’s more money!’ speech a few times until I told them it really wasn’t. These same people would put in orders for Uber eats 2-4 times on shift daily on the clock, have no life outside of work, no friends, dead relationships since they were never around, openly depressed ..and for what? To put in time for the ‘team’ and ostensibly make an extra shifts worth only to blow way more money than you would if you had the time or energy to work normally and not on call 24/7? Not to mention, 99% of these people end up becoming nearly useless at the job, because they’re ‘so tired’ and ‘overworked’, so ‘can you just do it?’
Obviously I have very strong feelings about this. I’ve lived it. Never again.
Some might say that you should at least offer a reason, but honestly, in your case, I wouldn’t even bother. It’s just going to be a reason that they’ll try to fight you on until you relent. Even if they would feel and do the same in other scenarios where they just didn’t want to for whatever reasons they had themselves.
NTA. You don’t owe them an explanation. Live your life and be there with your family when you want to be and can. Life is too short for this crap.
NTA they need to learn how to write a schedule better to accommodate w the prep demands
Make up reasons like childcare, taking care of grandma, …
NTA
NTA. Your workplace comes across as exploitative. It sounds like they maximise profit by being chronically understaffed and close the gap by driving their workers harder than is reasonable. Big Red Flag.
I think the saying “work to live, not live to work” applies here. In the early years of my employment I worked long hours (double shifts, on-call, weekends & public holidays), all the while thinking I was just providing for my family. It took me a long time to realise that I wasn’t providing the one thing that they were lacking, time. I missed out on so much as the kids were growing up. That is time I will never get back. I made the decision to cut back my hours a few years ago, but it was almost a case of too little, too late. Don’t make the same mistakes I did.
You are NTA in this situation, be there for your family and if your employer expects you to work above your contracted hours on short notice, than it is time to find a new employer.
I just started (like literally yesterday) a new job and he told me they typically work 4 10s, Monday – Thursday. Weather has been kinda shit and it’s an outside job, so I guess he texted everyone “if you want to come work Friday, we’ll go, if not, I don’t give a shit.”
And he meant it. Some of the guys showed up, some didn’t, and he didn’t care. If you’re given the “do you want to” and your answer is no, your answer is no. Already my boss is cool, he has said “From the time you clock in to the time you clock out I’m gonna be your boss but one minute after that I’ll be the chillest motherfucker on this earth I’ll work with you dude”
We had like 2 hours left out of 10, so we had already been at it for 8, and BossMan asked if we wanted to go get a head start on the next job. I mean, I spent most of the day going to get things and doing idle helper shit, just learning what the fuck we were even doing, so I didn’t care, but the guy that has been doing it longest kinda said “I gotta pick up my kid later and I’d rather not be totally drained when I see her.” BossMan said “alright we’ll just call it good after this one, I’m actually pretty fuckin happy with how fast this went anyways.”
Work hard and work fast when you’re supposed to. Don’t work more than you’re supposed to unless you want to.
NTA. You were scheduled for 6 hours and you said no to adding more time with barely any notice. That’s completely reasonable.
Wanting to go home, have dinner with your family, and put your kid to bed is a valid reason. Being short staffed is a management problem, not something you’re obligated to fix by giving up your personal time every time they ask.
NTA. Employers will ask and sometimes try to push, but that doesn’t mean you have to go along with that they want. Saying no doesn’t make you an asshole. You are allowed to say NO and have the availability that works for you and your family.
If the company requires all staff to take on extra hours to be successful it’s likely indicative of some internal issue, poor structure/organization, management etc. It is something they will have to address sooner or later, otherwise it’s not a sustainable way to run a business (unless this is just a short temporary thing that they asked of you all).
OP- NTA. Enjoy the time with your family. Sounds like the Manager should do something about being understaffed- and getting each shift to put in as much effort so the night shift doesn’t have to stay late to finish prep.